xXMy Comfort ZoneXx

Clear Stock

2006-10-30T16:00:00.000+08:00

Oct 19
Hmmm.Luckily for me the IO say All of us can be released until further notice. This according to some of the guys mens tat all of us are free!!! YEA!!!!

These days
Haiz, feeling so mixed up these few days, wif sch work needed to be done and done alr! Own stuff need to clear like my com..Which im transfrring to my bros rm, cause i feel everytime i go back i dun hav privacy and somemore i dun smoke nw in my rm, but he DOES... IN MY RM!! WTH.So though it is a very shagged idea to move to his rm, till i am goanna buy a new com, i will relax til the new com comes, haha!!

**Temperament to control, with which one muz control....to conquer cities**

Study!!

2006-10-13T04:45:00.000+08:00

Sch
Finally sch is starting this mon wif four modules to cover, all because of my LATE ATTENDENCE!! But then, i'll TRY to come to sch on time and study well for these four modules!!

Bike
TPs on Tues, hav to skip sch in the morn to go for it, hopefully everything goes well. Today RongXian brought his new R606 to show us, VERY 'ZAN' lor!! wondering if i might juz get this bike instead of the car....lol!

Oct 19
Hopefully nth will happen on this day, otherwise i'll hav to pay either $1000 or $2000 le... ;(

Sentosa
YEA!! Toms goin to Sentosa, gotta get the tan i wanted to be4 the hols end...Gals and sea.. IM COMIN!!!

**The mind is countered wif measures of safty, yet rashness and instability wif it often comes insanity and unconciousness..**

Long Trip to Malaysia

2006-10-03T06:00:00.000+08:00

Malaysia

Genes Car at the workshop doins his exchange of stuff frm old car (white) to new car (black)

Start of the 5hr process ;(

Was too tired, so went to slag in an air-con rm in the workshop, slept for a while be4 i noticed tat the rims tat they were displayin were quite standard, lol!

The rims tat i saw

Pic of me after a 20min nap

After this tiring 5hr wait, we went to another place to hav his exhaust pipes changed(Louder) and also grounding done

Changing of system and wiring

Saw this cute puppy at the kopitiam near the workshop and took a pic when the auntie there was playin wif it, haha!!

Pic of Mandy lookin TERRIBLY bored

Went to play wif the puppy when the auntie went off somewhere!! ;)

Genes car after like a 3hr wait for the thing to be finished

Well... tats half a day gone..with most of the shops closing, we had to leave even though onli half of wat he'd wanted to do was completed. Then a most unfortunate thing happen, the car which i was drivin suddenly jerked and died-ed. Theres no way Gene or me could start it. Loss at wat we should do, luckily at this time a few of his frds who were goin to do their cars went by and recognized his car, they stopped and gave Gene the num for 1 of their frds num (a mechanic).

the car stopped at the side fo the road

Then, we hav to wait on the spot for like an hr be4 his frds arrive

Poor Gene and Mandy lookin soo loss!

Finally, his frds arrive and went to check wat the prob is, then... we hav to wait for another like near to 2hrs be4 the car finally breathed!!!!
Me, Im bored there too, so did some shadow thingy wif mandy to cure the boredom while Gene was busy lookin at wat the mechanics are doin to his car.

Mandys Tiger

My Dog

When we can finally head hm(Singapore at last!!), its like 11plus le. Reached Singapore abt 12plus cause of some jam.LOL! can u believe it, No words to say!!!
Stayed at Genes hs cause next day hav to acc them go Malaysia ag to do up the uncompleted parts.

His new cars interior, the previous owner is one DISCO man, so "nan kan", Yucks!

OK, Nect day, All of us FRESH to go malaysia ag, to go WAIT ag!!!! Well... at least i am, takin pics whereever i go lol!

This time round drove one car in cause the old cars things had been transferred alr..

Reached the workshop abt 10plus, the shops nt open so we went to hav breakfast at a nearby kopitiam, while there, we saw an uncle still slpin while tendin to his stall, wonder if any1 take his thing and go, will he noe????

After waitin for like an hr, the wokrshop FINALLY opened!, went in to fix his car and THE LONG WAIT BEGINS!!!

Genes car at the workshop

A kid who was the son of the workshop boss came up to us and started playin wif us, and its like we've known each other for a long time, he was terribly frdly, lol! KIDS!!

Then soon afterwards, the grandpa came along and started talkin to us too, ! Wth! Too frdly for comfort!

After a long GRANDFATHER speech by the grandpa, we had our own time and laze ard lookin at magazines, damn siannzz!

Waited there for like 2hrs be4 we went to eat at the shoppin mall opposite, FINALLY some movement and stretching of muscles!! WHile on our way there, i saw a DAMN cute car, its wholly made up of "Hello Kitty" parapillia and stuff!!

LOL! Given this car to me, i will NOT DRIVE it in singapore!!!!

KFC, hw come theres a 'restoran' sign one????????

After a longer wait then yest(7hrs straight!!!) Gene suggested we relax ourselves and we went go-carting! Yea!

The red lines are for beginners like us and the blue lines are for the racers during a race, damn fun!!!

Recepit of the go-cart!Went 2 times, SHIOK AH!!!
AFter tat we went to a famous stall for our dinner, a well-known "Yong Tau Fu" stall there.

Even though the foods gd, but then price is TOOO steep alr, its like 10ringgit for a bowl, but then the milo ice is terrible, its like plain water lor, Gene sipped a little and nvr drank the rest, lol! I finished mine due to thirstiness!

Mandys, Genes, Mine!
Last stop is the petrol kiosk where we can see Gene shakin his car like mad to "Fill more petrol", LOL!!

After tat is hm sweet hm where i finally slept like a pig on my own bed, satisfied tat i hav had fun in malaysia and learned alot abt cars too, haha!!
BUt then only thing wasted is tat i NVR GO SHOPPIN!! soo bored! Lucky for me i juz gt a pair of new specs, costed abt near to $400 for this simple-but-uncle-say-very-fashion specs, well, at least i gt somthing!LOL!

My new specs

Prezzie

Bought by Gene when he went Thailand tat day, quite cool yea!

Schs starin in a couple of weeks time, gotta do wat i hav to do and work liao, cars goin to be ON THE WAY!! YEA!!
waitin.......

**Patience is but a virtue**

Back Ag!!!

2006-09-25T00:20:00.000+08:00

Gt a few new photos to contribute.haha.

Genes Bd at Addicted

My new deco. Nice? Little blurish though.

Given by my bro, Sooooo sweet of him! this is ONCE IN A BLUE MOON!
Had wanted to get one of this for quite some time!This should be inverted to 90degrees, but then.. i dun noe hw...lol! this is the red light on the right of the upper pic.

This is the left side of the 1st pic!

After all this, went to Huifens Bd at Arandas (Pasir Ris).

Bd Gal

Her sliver key! 21st!

Bikers! Haha!

Bike
Past 1st liao, Wed goin for 2nd. Target is 17 oct. Hopefully!! :)

Self
wondering, if by any chance, hmmmmmm...
Still goin on, but then no work alr, VERY BORED!! Mizz it TOTAL! Talked wif gene ag abt getting a new car, he was tellin me to sell off my bike, but then gt feelins alr, somemore 'Esther' is gd to me, goin fast when i nid her to, cruisin when i wan to, wat could be better then tat?? but then, will hav to really wait til i start work 1st, was thinkin if gettin a car maybe get a red number plate 1st, thinkin...

**Have you no pain to suffer, as i hav, no joy to giv, as i hav, no worries to endure, as i hav.. or issit tat none in this world satisfies u, as i hav, to be as carefree and free as the mornin sun......**

Clubbin.

2006-09-20T16:40:00.000+08:00

Went to Tanjong Pagar opposite Great World wif Vin, Boyboy, JJ and Gui the other day, had this LIVE prawn noodles which were great! (It is LITERALLY LIVE prawns caught frm the tank and cooked on demand!) Costed $6 for my bowl cause i ordered 2 pranws, nt considered ex alr cause one prawn is abt an inch thick! Its big! somemore the noodles in which i ordered dry, comes wif a think sauce whcih feels like a mixture of 'Lor Mee' and 'Mee Rebus'! The soup... the soup is tonic soup which makes my mouth water even nw as im writting this entry!lol!

After tat we went Serangoon Coffee Bean for chilling out and while we were there, we practically talked abt everything under the sun. Frm gals to work to sch to army to IMF thing to self saving of heart attacks!

It was the last topic which we had quite an interesting amount of time talkin abt. It was abt hw a grp of bangalas would loiter ard a club or disco or some nightspot. When a drunkend gal comes out, they will force her nito a cab and go off to God noes where. Boyboy recalled one of his frds saying tat they ad seen this happening and the whole thing happened be4 any1 could react!

I mean, lets nt be racially discriminative, it could be any chinese men or malay men out there doin it, and worst if they have their own transport.

Tats why i seldom approve of gals ALWAYS goin to clubbin, i mean, tats the place where wolves feast!.... Tats also the main reason why i broke up wif my ex. Haiz..

Work
Everythings gd ehre, somehw or rather i dun miss sch, i'll miss work though, haha!
The Seminar in which we had prepared so hard for had ended wif one of our co-workers whom i juz met there sayin that im very 'professional' in the way i handled the guests and the events. well am i pleased!! after tat one of the waitresses according to feedback frm my colleagues was flirting wif in which i didnt even noe of, they said they they could see very distinctly they way she talked to me and asked me for coffee.LOL!!

Self
been stressed alot, dun noe why, maybe its due to the fact tat because of my laziness i had to repeat one more sem....... other then tat i seem to get very easliy irritated, i dunnoe why, my old temper is resurrecting and im trying very hard to control it. Had asked Vin to keep me in his prayers, cause i noe i cant do this alone...Hopefully everything turns out fine..

**the chance of a lifetime, thrown away cause of slacking ard**

Nths goin my way..

2006-09-20T16:38:00.000+08:00

Well... Ive written a WHLOE lot of things juz one hr ago, then due to carelessness on MY part, i ACCIDENTALLY deleted it. @#$!@%$#^%#@%^@$&$**$*@#&^#%^*#!!!!!

Nw... hmmm.. no words to say... &*%#$*@(%)%^*$^@#^&$^(&^&!!!!!!!!

Start..

2006-09-17T15:09:00.000+08:00

Its been some time since Ive started blogging, partly due to business and also partly due to laziness. Well, tats gd in a way, and bad in one way too. Gd in the sense tat Ive did wat ive wanted to do during the peroid i wasnt free, bad in the way tat i had sort of 4gotten wat happened during this period. For me, this blog is a memory of wat had happened, hw it happenend and why. A reminisence and reminder of things which can and will be done and others which should nt be...

All in all, will try to continue ag, wouldnt want to waste Jane's efforts down the drain rite?.

**Back at one ag, but then...are 2 really better????**

Somewhere out there....

2006-06-05T00:33:00.000+08:00

Work
Was late for work today, supposed to work at 11.00, i 11.30 then am ready to work, in the end had to sacrifice half and hr of my PRECIOUS break time because of the lateness. When it comes to work, i had to always compromise and weigh work and study. On one side, my manager is always lookin out for me and helpin me in ways she can, on the other side if she say nt enuff ppl then i would be very bad to say no right? But then if i say yes to her, then my study would be compromised cause of rushin here and there and then hm to shagged out to do anything cept slp. But then i told her alr for the followin next few weeks i would be busy cause of pros and exams. Then she say if can then help her lor, somehw or rather i feel indebted to her.....

Today 2 customers aksed me a quite familiar ques ag. One is "You Singaporean?" (Se tot i was frm Korea!!), another was, "Are u Australian?".... Well somehow or rather im used to it alr, but then i ws thinkin do i really nt look like im frm Singapore?? As a gal ALWAYS says, "Hmmmmm........."
Sch
Red light...

Self
Been smokin less cigars nowadays, tryin nt to..but then findin no reason to stop, cept for the fact its no gd, all the things i had done, are either for someone or for a cause. This one, im tryin to find a cause, im always thinkin, it for my health, its for encouragment to others, its for my future family. But then all this seemed so vague. its for myself, still the same. Remembered the time when Esther asked me nt to smoke, i quitted that day, for 4 mths straight. Tat time i even felt gross and sick when i smelt cigar smoke.. People might find tat im exaggerating the fact of me smokin, but then its actually a thing which can hold me tog, when im lonely, i smoke, when im stressed, i smoke, when im findin a solution, i smoke.

Maybe its true, i think too damn much, but then if i nvr think, wat happens in juz a short while will be forgotten forever, and chances will slip away. As they always had wif me, juz dun hav the luck or anything, either in work, play, or romance.

Wnet to CCK yest night, was goin to meet Taz they all but then after tat they changed location. Met up wif a few of my previous "frds", surprised that most of them still remembered me, Lot 1 changed alot, I hav changed alot, many things hav changed. They asked hw am i doin, i said im gd on my side, for them they are stil the same. I mean, im happy for myself tat im this way nw, which to some may be wuite slag still, but i noe tat im 180degrees frm wat i was be4, though there are still changes i need to do. I hope, tat "someone" will come soon and giv me a hand, clear the mist, dry the rain and bring the sun....

**Angels of the sky,
fill each of us with ur light.
that all that sees u will be enlightened,
with wings that soar thru the lonely skies,
with pride that happiness is found,
with tears of joy none can comprehend.
For the isolated ones are the only ones
for which hunger and thirst awaits them,
Touch all who gaze upon u,
Where nth can hinder us thru life.
Guide all whom i encounter,
tat i may be a pillar of strength,
nt a pillar of salt.**

ALOT of pic ...FINALLY!!!

2006-06-04T02:30:00.002+08:00

this time i will post more pics (if i hav) for... a pic says a thousand words...

Below are sum of the pics taken during the LAST FYP day

Celia and Zhen Qi

Yingxi and frd Zhen Qi
Bikers

The HAPPY guys
Ouch
Scissors, no paper and hav stones

A very nice pic indeed

Wats wif the hands??
Bullied

X men. At Cathay Grand
Bak Kut Teh.Nice but Ex

Thats abt all folks, actually gt alot, but then cause of the file size i cant put too many.

Created a fun quiz thing too, got it frm Taz the 1st time, seems quite fun so i tried it too haha. Im juz happy tat i got to post these pic ans also update my bolg, com hung on me for the sec time alr, dun noe wats wrong...But then i hope its juz temporarily. Heehee

**The soul needs a break sumtimes, to ease off frm the worries of life**

ALOT of pic

2006-06-04T02:30:00.001+08:00

ALOT of pic

2006-06-04T02:30:00.000+08:00

Hmmmmm...............

2006-05-23T00:47:00.000+08:00

Sch
Broke my visor today, in the end hav to buy another one, think hav to use the tinted one at hm for a while 1st be4 i get the new one. Went to eat breakfast wif vin they all and talked wif andrew they all for a while, ordered a SPEACIAL ORDER of EXTRA eggs for the big breakfast, totally SHIOK man!!! During the last tut for Jason Chung's one, i listened to him speak for a while, understood wat he was tokin abt, but then he seemed very long-winded, in the end i slept wifout noeing it!! after tat wanted to slag a while be4 doin the xml thingy, but then time REALLY flies, be4 i knew it its time to go back, lol, in the end had to go back hm to do the stuff..

Self
rained this evenin, juz when i cant put my visor dwn cause its broken...felt slightly relaxed today cause gt no work after sch, went hm and listened to my mum's 'music' as she rants on abt my visor, abt y is it broken, nt to wear the black one, blah, blah, blah..........After comin back hm, i told myself to stop smokin till 10, juz tryin out, in the end i 'tong' till the time i met neo for supper, tats like near 11.. =p But then nt really enduring it, is juz tat im doin my xml pro thing, then nvr really tot of smokin....durin this time a 'xi ke' was talkin wif me, talked wif yingxi for quite a while be4 i finally stopped everything i was doin and went to eat supper due to hungryness.. Talked abt everything under the suntill my stomach interrupted... but then when she laugh must hear her laugh, cause she gt the type of laughs tat onli little children has, cute and sweet..haha!! In the end went to chong pang nasi lemak wif neo.while we were ther we saw a show by andy lau..nice show, was eatin food and watchin the show like in a cinema like tat (we were seated DIRECTLY in front of the TV) was tellin neo next time must come up wif sumthing like tat for the cinemas, eatin gd food and watching gd movies!! lol!

**Stand still, and be still, when the tides of calamity arises.
then thou shall overcome it all, thee man of great calm..**

Jam

2006-05-20T04:44:00.000+08:00

Malaysia
Wanted to go wif Vin tonite tog wif JJ and Pearline, but then in the end reached there MAJOR jam!!! No words to say, went past lorries tat smelt like S***, but luckily i went past a MPV wif a kid inside, made faces wif the kid and he played along wif me, sort of lightened up my stress lvl for a while, haha!! In the end we U-turned and ended up in a kopitiam where we saw Boy boy and James, they were stucked there also..Heehee , poor thing..

During slackin at the kopitiam, we talked abt pearline's frd Liyan, she got my admiration when i heard tat she is providing a little for her little bro, little sis, little bit of her family's needs and doesnt seemed perturbed by it all.Somemore she is Pearline's age, 21. She is really a 'Niu Qiang Ren' !! Was tellin them she will make a very gd housewife and will definitely care a lot for her future family.

After fillin Esther up to the brim, i saw one of my SSDC frds there, in the end he also knew Xiao Ti, wat a small world!!

Work
There was alot of ppl at work today, though supervisor was there, it was a really different exp when ur mindset is different, i felt better and even happy workin there for a while, serving this customer, attending to another's request, in the end worked till 10.30, when im supposed to knock off at 9.30. LOL! But then the exp was there so gd!

During break time called Pauline and she 'Pei' me go smoke, she worked juz behind my workplace and this i knew onli cause i saw her yesterday when i was at Mr Bean wif Vin, Pearline and JJ. Was thinking after work jio her go smoke ag, but then worked till so late alr ppl go back liao ah..

Sch
...........

Self
hmmmm...

***Actions speak louder than words....***

Work - Gd or Bad........

2006-05-19T03:42:00.000+08:00

Sch
YiQing nvr come to sch ag today, dun noe y, hmmmm... Happy's HAPPY ag wif her sickness over i tink.. Haha! Imagine the contradiction when Happy's SAD!! But then, as the saying goes, To err is Human, to forgive is..... : ) Nvr came for the tut and pracs in the early afternoon, cause got a misunderstanding tat i tot was e-learning, Haiz...lucky my attendance is enuff to cover it. Anyway, the pros start alr and everybody is goin to be buzi once ag.. My attitutes' nt very rite when i came to sch today, dun noe is it because of PMS or sumthing, juz couldnt focus my mind rite on the things i should do and nt do, Juz feel irritated and frustrated....

Work
Everythings' fine cept for the supervisor which i SINCERELY hope would nt pick on me ag(IMPOSSIBLE), she can ALWAYS find sumthing to say abt me, wondering if it is because she noes hw much my manager is lookin out for me, i mean, my manager is a very polite and fair gal, whereas my supervisor is an arrogant and petty b***** who cant seemed to stand the sight of guys,LOL! Well, Im staying, FINAL!! Because i noe i will gain sumthing if i can stand these type of ppl, she will cause a prick to my flesh with all the stabbin of my back, but then i noe i can withstand all these nonsense and emerge VICTORIOUS!! HAH! Back to u, LADY! and tats MR ADAM to u!!

Self
feelin moody and lost these days, tryin to keep a straight face but then sumtimes juz cant.. felt tat when i really try to get sumthing done, i get slapped in the face everytime i giv it a shot, discouraging, sad to say. But then nevertheless im still tryin, harder eveytime, its like u noe all the things u need to do to make things rite, but then nth ever seems to go ur way, it always eludes u and makes things so hassling, so difficult to proceed on, breatheless... Imagine u hav juz got a glimmer of hope, then a great big cloud comes and took away everything... I mean, my life's always not goin very smoothly, so Y CANT IT GO SMOOTHLY FOR ONCE????? CANT i taste happiness and peace for a change and enjoy warmth and sunny days, or is it that im reachin that pinnacle in life when EVERYTHING goes wrong? I try so hard to act normal when in shc,but then its oh so hard, its hard when u are tryin to be normal when everythings' in ur life is upside dwn..... But no way am i gonna lose to these challenges, these are but obstacles tat i can pass on, .......

***Lost in the shadows of humanity,
Crumpled to bits as one flee.
Emptiness is but a kind of feelin,
Where one gets when life is goin.
Help is not to be given here,
Searching for nth is the greatest fear.
Lookin thru eyes tat see nt,
hearing thru ears tat hear nt.
Glancing back as the ages flew by,
Watching days go with the blink of an eye.
Have u ever felt this sadness,
or raged on in unknowing madness.
Have u ever been so helpless,
tat the dearest always leave the 1st.
No one can understand all this thoughts,
BUt eveyone who lives hav these feelins fought.
All in all can we as humans,
do wat is right juz like infants.
WAt to do and when is right,
Wat comes after the darkness and the light.
Try as we may nth ever seems enough,
We cant be as pure as the peaceful doves.
But then wat is to be done is always now,
Wat we respond when the goin gets down.
Are we able to withstand it all,
To emerge victorious or to crumble and fall....***

Life...............

2006-05-16T05:08:00.000+08:00

Blog
Changed to a more recent song this time, one by Lin Jun Jie - Sa Dan A O(Korean for I-LUV-U). Very nice this song.

Sch
Slagged for a while today, Yingxi tested both Vin's and Yang's bike today, really looked like a biker gal!! Haha!! JJ's down with headache, but then with ample rest should do the trick.. ALso hopin Vin will past his final theory today, hopefully...

Com
Im SURPRISED tat bro did nt use the com yest and today, maybe he's too tired these few WEEKS playin the game..Well.. gd for me!! HeeHee...

Self
Filled with confusion abt wat i should do, but then, the ans are there alr. I always ask myself, God.. U had called me out into this place, changed me 180 degrees to one whereby none of my previous frds can barely recognize me...soo...soo.soo Mr Goody-Pants, I asked Him, Y did u bring me to this place, is it to let me exp pain, suffering, love-forsakeness.. As i was sharing wif JJ earlier on in the nite, i tot of the past me, i mean, wat i had was $, and there was countless gals who were willing to be wif one tat has...tats nt a worry for me in the past, I didnt even tot tat i could be in this type of situation be4..Maybe.... maybe He has called me, transformed me so tat i may exp this feeling of being rejected, being dumped, being lonely... My!! Hw the tables hav turned........ But ..all in all Im glad tat i hav became this way, piority being parents are ALOT more contented and eased tat im 'OK' nw.. Another being i now tat my future family would be a safe and gd one, because of the lifestyle im creating for them in the future..

Most ppl are always stayin in their comfort zones, one tat they would nt budge juz because they are too used to the lifestyle tat they are having nw, i mean, tats human, its very unbearable for u to tell them to change after so many years, sometimes these changes can be gd, eg..ME!! But then there could be bad ones also..

Couldnt slp, though i hav work later on after sch, i want to , but then my mind JUZ CANT STOP THINKIN..Of wat im nt sure, but then ag, of her who is yet to come...

************************************
Where is Thee,the one tat shall love me,
tat Thou shall comfort and make me 4get
these unnessary tots and ease me of
the lonliness and sorrow,
Riddin my bed of its ascending coldness,
and put in place of it warmth and bliss,
with words of comfort and tears of joy will u bring to me,
with joyous emotions and contented feelings
that is to me more important
than any gold or diamond in the world.
That the very words of urs bring with it summer,
the very presence drives away the winter cold.
The one tat is to come, but has yet to be,
waited hav i long for this bright sunny sun,
which would repel the dark rainy days of mine,
for her smile to melt away this frozen heart in me,
for her tears to wash away the cuts tat i had beared be4.
I cant see clearly but wif u, cant hear wisely wifout ur lenient reprimands,
walk but without aim, slp but wifout rest.
Come to me u who is out there,
show me the way tat i've walked halfway through,
but which had gotten so dim i need ur light of love,
to penetrate thru the shadows..
Believe tat i can giv, provide,
and show u tat im the one u can be with,
the one who will bring to u happiness,
life and never-ending bliss...
************************************

Dead!

2006-05-15T02:18:00.000+08:00

Hamster
I LOST Mickey and Minnie due to negligence on my part, i feel lost, sad, tat they are gone. Missed their playin ard the wheels, the sounds of theirs....

Work
My supervisor really heated me up, she DID nt say the reason y im CONSIDERED late tat day, all because i did nt bring the correct shirt tat day and she nag here and talked there and im late for 5 mins... (suppose to satrt at 1.30, i came 5mins be4hand but then i started at 1.35) In theend the manager tot i was late for very long till i told her the whole situation today..IM DAMNED ANGRY!!! but then gd for me the manager is my bro's frd, she asked me wat happened and also offered to giv me a pair of pants and shirts to wear for my work (and im plaanin to actually buy them, would hav costed me abt 100+!!)

Sch
watin for sch to start, waitn for this poly to end, waitin for work to start, waitin for my new car to arrive...PATIENTLY......

Self
smoking....quitting....trying...helplessly.....neverthelessly......stilly.....tryin.....

**The answers of which u were born wifout, the means of finding them which u were born with**

theEnd, theBeginning....

2006-05-07T06:14:00.000+08:00

Sch
Everythings fine for now, cept for the pros and homework which needs more time to it. The homework are just extra things which i feel must be done which includes things like doin tuts be4 the actual tut, readin the notes be4 elct and stuff... Just feelin kinda bored in sch, and in everywhere else, haizz.... the only place i wanna be everyday is the beach..... (Mr LAZEy bones!!).

Work
Will be quiting the job by this Sun, wasted i cant get the Chivas Bartender T-shirt!!!! Wanted to buy frm them but then the manager say cant!! Sian!! One thing gd though, Ive learnt another new skill in bartending, but then this is only the very basic and also not very standard bartending, but its an exp for me.. There are also funny incidents like for a few times the staff there mistook me for a customer and stopped me when im tryin to retrieve the cups frm their stations!!(This misunderstandin is because even though im supposed to wear the tshirt, because im nt confirmed, tats y i wore my own black color shirt to work.) There was once i went to take the teaspoons frms the buckets as there was a shortage, the supervisor who was there couldnt regcognice me and LITERALLY GRABBED my arm and asked "Sir, if u nid anything we can get for u.. " I mean, LOL, no words to say, haha!! And then today there was a staff at the stations, when im nearing the stations to look for an empty bucket, she used her SWEETEST smile and smiled and asked me, "Hi Sir, Gd evening! May i ask wat u are lookin for?"(this gal was VERY sweet in actual person itself) Her colleagues who knew who i was told her i was the bartender there and she turned very red, giggled and turned away. Later on when i saw her i faked an innocent face and asked her for a teaspoon, she laughed and jokingly passed me a dirty one, then we both laughed!! haha !, that was fun! On top of alll this, i was smokin at the behind area where the toilets were. A lady who was goin into the ladies stopped in her tracks when she saw a 'guy' come out of the ladies, but then in actual fact the 'guy' was actually a butch who looked COMPLETELY like a guy, the poor lady maybe had a fright of her life !!!!!!

haha!all in all it was quite fun workin there, but then this job is goin to end but another one is comin up, at first i was goin to go for an interview at Zouks, then just now my bro introed me to a job a Taka G2000, iand I think tat most prob im able to work there..wonderin if it is a gd thing or a bad one....

Bike
Esthers gonna be very mad alr cause i havent gave her the full servicin that she nids,,,somemore i ahvent been goin to malaysia, so everything shes abt to go empty...haha, maybe tom goin in alr..somemore i havent gave ehr a wash for like ages,,must wash her next week..

Self
Sat at my block downstairs yest, tot of Grace, of Esther(the real one!), tot of the time tat we were together, somehow or rather the gals tat ive really put in all my ehart i cant seem to forget them, they had alr been given a special place in my heart where i couldnt erase, tot of the times tat were sweet, of the times we had our arguements, of the times tat were so funny i smiled even now thinkin of them..Even though we have onli shared like abt 4 mths for each of them, they were nvr less important to me..Noein tat that special someone for each of us is out there somewhere, waiting to be discovered..Nevertheless, im waiting to see who is tat gal who will break tat 6mths mark(1/2yr) and eventually one yr..thinkin to my self tat the one who has seen BOTH my grandparents will roughly be the one tat will stay on wif me, for both Esther and Grace had onli seen one side of my grandparents, tat is my Fathers side, they havent seen my Mothers side, but then these things will hav to wait til im goin to work i guess, now in sch theres hardly any eligible 'flowers' tat i can pick, very few who suits the pattern i wan, but then hey! Ppl always say the one u always wanted isnt always the one u are gonna marry, so im givin it a pass now, until further notice...!!!

**Like the deserts in the storm,
Over mountains so high, rivers so wide.
Vexing on wat is my piority,
Escaping frm reality's clutches.

Many things ive yet to see,
Emotional stuff ive yet to experience.

Forgetting tat i am only a human,
Objecting tat i cant be a saint.
Realising for a fact im special...Even though im vulrulnable.

WIshing somehow i will succeed,
Hoping tat i will be the best.
On hills i will soar and seas i will rise, to obstacles i will conquer and troubles i will solve.

In all i can be the one i want, it all comes to a state of mind.

Answer is that we all must try,
Minding the facts that we all can fly!!**

...............

2006-04-26T23:14:00.000+08:00

Sch
Im having no lesson on Fri.YEA!!!! this is because of the onli 2 comm skills lessons are shifted to next week, haha, lucky me. PLanning to go Sentosa. : )

Bike
Will be doin Esther's servicing next week, the materials and stuff are all in place alr, nw all that is needed is to find a workshop to do her in...

Self
Saw her today.. She will be goin for the same excursion as me in NE. HAHAHA!!! : ) But then wondering why is she putting makeup these few days????? Hmmm... didnt do tat last sem.... Whose she tryin to impress???? but then shes ok alr even wifout makeup, nt to say wif it on!!!!
Somehw or rather got this feelin when ever shes wif some guy is that i get the feelin of sourness, "suan suan" de, haiz, shes no one to me, but then.... Anyway its all rite, i've to stick to my policy of even if u really like a person, if she is happy where she is, then im happy too....

**Tough times dun last, only tough ppl do...**

Afresh!!!!

2006-04-17T03:11:00.000+08:00

Sch
Im finally able to start sch tom.haha! Waited for like eons be4 it finally came!!! Nw i've to focus and buck up.... One thing's bothering me though, i havent told my parents abt the debarment thing...haiz!!!! Hw shall i put it to them????

Bike
Gave Esther a wash today, plus i went to Malaysia and fed her to the full, Haha!! Think im goin to giv her the servicing one of these days....

Pub
Went to Addicted Place the day yesterday and saw a commotion... A guy was unsatisfied that his turn at pool was skipped and went to mess up the balls on the table and sort of shouted at the guy who took his turn, but then wat he did not noe is tat the guy whom he shouted at had a bunch of quite rowdy frds also, in the end, abt 10 over guys beat up the guy who messed up the balss....Haiz, In turn i was nt able to sing my Careless Whisper.... JUst cool it man, its alll JUZ A GAME!!!!

Self
Hopefully everything is ok nw, wondering hw Grace is doin on her side, wishing her all the best in watever she's doin, .but then she must be thinkin hw come this guy could be soo heartless as to "release" her, i mean, she is a gd girl, its juz tat i dun foresee a future wif her, she desearves some1 much more better then me.... On my side, still recovering frm the emotional wounds frm leavin her, but then i mus be strong for the sake of my future, the one that i wanna create....

***It comes as a drift of wind, silent, calm, yet devestating as a thousand troops.... L.O.V.E.***

IM BACK!!!!!

2006-04-09T04:15:00.001+08:00

Own
Finally im back to where i've stopped...Haha!! : ) Fixed up the com wif everything in order cept for the application programs that my sch hav to use.(HAve to do it one way or another..)..
PLZZZ God help me to keep my computer free of anymore ATTACKS in the future, had installed alot of spyware and adware programs so plzzz dun giv up on me , computer, cause i 've nt!!!

Bike
There's been a hissing sound comin frm my front tyre which to the guys opinion is due to me rampin my bike maybe durin one of the Malaysia escapades!! This is maybe because the brake pad's a little dented, hoping to get it fixed by May, on top of that the full servicing, maybe considering getting it done by Clarences frd, deciding.....

Sch
The hols goin to be over, and im STARTIN SCH AFRESH AGGGG!! Its good to be back!! Haha!!

Self
Lotsa things happened, some gd, some bad. Works nt very gd, ive skipped goin to work the last day and i dunno hw to ans to tat!! I mean they woudnt believe me tat ive went out wif my previous colleagues and gotten drunk, so DEAD DRUNK tat i practically woke up one day after.. (wondering if this is partly due to the emotional storm tat ive been thru....).Im tooo ashamed to ans to them, this adam who is nw protrayed as a man who is irresponsible, and irrcorrigible... Im juz worried for Michelle for it was she who introed me to this job and maybe she would be accused of introing a 'wasted' guy into the job...Haiz!!

**The days pass with no acknowledgement of who is...and who isnt...**

IM BACK!!!!!

2006-04-09T04:15:00.000+08:00

Trying....

2006-02-06T03:55:00.000+08:00

Sch
Missed sch last fri, all because i could nt slp at nite and stayed up all nite, till like 7 plus then my eyes auto closed! and my lesson starts at 8!!! No choice, somemore i've to finish up the pro and faster keep up with the design of the pro, felt tat i've nt been doin very many things, but then, engine is hot but the driver isnt, haha, wat to do nw wat to do.... gotta revise also for the exams......

Self
Feeling lonely, missed her soo F@@@@@@ much, then ag wondering if she is onli playin along or does she miss me to, i dun noe, but i cant stop my emotions frm feeling this way... All im hoping for is tat she can love me, and nt falsely love me... Mixed emotions always cloud my mind, y??? feel tat she still loves me, but then also feels tat shes nt...wating for her call...everytime i return home i would hav this expectation hoping tat she will be in my room, dwnstairs waitin for me, givin me a surprise, i would be soo contented, so happy alr, but then,she wouldnt, she cant, she will nt.... Wondering y does God alwasy giv me gals, noeing in the end i would suffer, noeing tat i would be hurt, so deeply tat i surprise myself even...tot i can let go, tats it, FINAL...But then i cant, y is it so, y cant i find a gal who loves me and treats me gd, simple and gd, y does the gals tat i had found always always hurt me soo deeply...

**Winds of loneliness, sands of insanity
helps everyone when they are down.
Cruel time, and merciless crowds,
mock at u with vicious frowns.
Looked everywhere for a hiding place,
searched everywhere for a deserted solace,
all i've found was hurt and pain,
all i've found was the Devil's gaze.
Help me Lord dun deny my plea,
giv me the strength and comfort me.
Triump over my enemies that i shall win,
Glory, happiness tat all will see....**

Haiz...

2006-02-02T17:22:00.000+08:00

Sch
Haha goin to Work first, then go studyin...gdgd. Poor Irvin was lamenting and grumbling abt all the bad abt it, hahaaha.. im ok wif it, especially that i can expereience first the work life and how to adapt to it..hehehehehe.

Self
Many things and situations caused me to forgo alot of appointments wif my frds, missing and skippin many of them... Becomin too complacent with myself and not goin too hard.. Tryin harder, engine too cold alr becoz of too much slaggin these few days and weeks.... Really wonder wats the meanin of everything, that sumtimes when the things that u wan happens to u, u wiil become bored and not cherish it, the feelings that i've had be4 was juz nt there anymore, y??? cant be who i used to be anymore, was it becoz of the other one, or it is juz me.... tormenting myself whenever i try. yet when one hand is doin this thing, i cat do the other thing correctly and smoothly.. Becomin more inwardly bound and hackcare, nt myself but y am i becomin like this, isst becoz of situations that brings me to this place or all myself....

It is a thing that causes one to lose oneself,totally forgetting ones composure and letting go of all dignity, yet it causes much warmth to one while bringin alot of anger to another.Worries and struggles it will consisst, and on the other side will be bliss and happiness, but the who is rite and who is wrong, who noes the limit and who can fathom wat will happen next...none... Yet, on top of everyhthing,it all comes down to ones undyin love for another, while to another it is continuing anguist and unbearable ...... LOVE = Love Often Violates Emotions

**THe greatest of emotions,yet the destroyer of all....**

Back..

2006-01-27T15:38:00.000+08:00

too many things have happended alr these past few mths..

Got to get goin no matter wat..

**when the goin gets tough..the tough gets goin..**

Is it to be???

2005-12-24T04:27:00.000+08:00

Soo tired, so shagged out...wondered if it is meant to be...wat does it all imply? None noes, but then physically its draining me, mentally it devouring me frm inside out.This feelin that i've asked for had turned me upside down, the lack of concentration has led to despair and anguist. So then, is it the ending that is to be,or is it the ending i wan. Somtimes i hope it would be wat i wan, but then it seems to drift further and furhter away frm me, y? failed so many ppl who had high hopes on me, was it cause of my improper judgement, tat i;ve touched somtimes not to be touched, or is it my fault..tat everything had turned out this way....

???i've to get goin no matter wat...???

Festive joys....issit???

2005-12-06T10:36:00.001+08:00

Sch
Been recovering from the MAJOR number of times i've not been goin to sch. But then still missed some of the lessons now, partly due to exhuastion and lack of time management, Going up steadily but then still hav to chase the others...

Work
Still fine in the workplace, except there are a bit of minor disturbances now and then, everything on the whole seems managable..

Self
Sometimes im thinking whether it is rite to feel this way, maybe im juz thinking too much,maybe im not contented enuff, not sure. But then hav to bear thru this few weeks 1st be4 anything can be finalized, juggling between al wif the two tiny hands i hav, a MAJOR problem, often neglecting some and putting too much concentration on others... B's been very gd, yet sometimes i feel i must noe her even more, cause its like i had not knew her be4, yet we are so close, hav to see for myself where this all leads, cause it will not be a sad one, this i must prevent.waiting for the time when we could relly sit back and relax for a while, cause i noe she's very tired alr, but then she still hav to go on, hope to giv her a better life in the future........Struggleing in my heart, when i see her so stressed, so exhausted, feelin i've not done my part at all........

"Contentment is hw we go about to approach it"

Dilemma...

2005-11-29T12:34:00.000+08:00

Sch
Not very gd that i hav skipped sch for a few dayz cause overtired.but nw goin on the track ag and pushin on once ag for the things ive set to do.must catch up wif the others and exceed them alr otherwise not gd on my side.

Bike
She got scratches on the side of her tank!!! AHHHHHHH!! thinkin it is due to my le cog bag wif the spooks underneath that caused it, damn sian,cause next time selling it will be a drawback alr...havent been washin her also,though had been givin her gd oil(singapore oil)! hahaha! must take care of her otherwise she cant take care of me when i need her...

Work
Tempers been rising during work these part few days, partly because im sick and of all dayz the customers choose to ALL come at once! lol! bUT THEN will continnue to keep my composure and do wat needs to be done, dun wnana change jobs because of sumthing bad happening.

Self
In a choice of whether to continue or to stop, its all a matter of words myself but then this is one that i hav to choose wisely cause the wrong choice will lead to regret and anguist, whereas the rite one will elad to renewed vitality in life and continuing buildups of any relationships goin on.Somehw i will strive to make it better, for this is one that ive asked for,nw i wanna make it work.....Doin all i can , giving every thing i hav to make things better for the future that is within my reach...

**Everything happens for a cause, in the event of anything that causes sumthing to occur, there is a reason and that is wat we should aim for...**

Making things right

2005-11-15T10:39:00.000+08:00

Now using Grace laptop to update my blog... in her sch nw..

Sch
School reopen le... so far always late for sch.. overslept... only nv sch for once cos sick... Yesterday grace had a tour in NYP.. She said our sch is nice as the sch has fountain, has bigger lab tat can occupied over 40 PCs and the lift is veri advaced as her sch lift was old n slow... She enjoyed the tour yet more to come..

Bike
Gt smoke come out from my exhaust pipe.. a little while only lar.. hope is ok... also quite long time nv wash bike le.. wipe only... grace say if gt time she will help me to wash.. :)

Blog
I decided NOT to change my song le.. cos grace said that the song is nice..

Self
Very tired, but is worth it.. :) last fri was our 1st mth anniversary.. i nv work n grace took half day to accompany me.. so we met in the evening.. i went back hm after playing billard wif JJ they all, took my dad's van n went to find her.. tat day CTE was having traffic jam.. and i was 3 hr late.. reached at citylink ard 8.45pm.. Grace was veri angry tat day as she waited for so long and she wanted to go shopping... so we went to RafflesCity food junction for dinner and later we went to buy shoes( at least she feels better after buying the shoes).. thn later went to Esplanade to sit there n chat.. Overall, we were still happy n is a memorable day.. Yesterday accompany grace to go shopping.. shopping is her fav le.. whn i see her shop so happily, i also happy.. cos we nv spend much time on shopping.. thn at night we went for a movie wif JJ, Irvin n Pearline.. The Movie name is "Just Like Heaven".. it is funny n touching.. at least is a happy ending...

"Diffferent people have different perception.. We cant Please everyone"

Wat comes 1st....

2005-11-07T09:42:00.001+08:00

Sch
Starting sch today, havin mixed feelings of 'Yea! faster finish up on this sch thing and go to work alr' while another part of me is like 'Ohhh.... Stated soo fast...groan.' Well, started sch wif a very gd example for the following sem dayz though, class supposed to start at 9, woke up at 8.40, get readied at 8.50, left hm at 9..wat a great way to start the 1st day of the sch..

Bike
Visor kana stolen at Esplanade carpark a few dayz ago, very pissed off wif the thief. Somemore to add to the FLAME IN MY HEART, it rained...... Grace sacrificed and let me hav her visor while she beared the rain by HIDING behind me..

Blog
Wanted to change my songs inside here but then these is something wrong wif my mp3 convertor, it always jams up or not it is very very slag, cant change it alr. A little tired of hearing the same songs ag and ag....wat to do, thinkin theres something to do wif my com also...

Self
these days "chi hon" wif grace and NEGLECTED the rest was enriching for me... I've not felt this feelin for a very long time.but then wat matters most is that we are all happy and contented.Im happy when im wif her, she's the one which can brighten up my feelings no matted wat feelins i hav, be it anger, joy, worry, trouble.... though i've got to arrage all my activities so that it will not clash wif the pros comin up.... little sad thoughi could not spend more time wif her though.....

"may all things come to those who truly strive for it.."

Wat comes 1st....

2005-11-07T09:42:00.000+08:00

Hols End

2005-10-30T05:48:00.000+08:00

Hols
Holidays gonna be over in a while, havent rested enuff though, dun noe y..but then still felt happy i've achieve sumthing this holiday..: )

Work
Suntimes i feel pressured and pushed because of my good nature, really wanna shout out and lash out at any1 and every1, but then work is like this, hav to relax and let go, hopin everything will turn out fine.

bike
Getting dirty, no time..haha

grace
we're together...enjoyin the time together, loathing the moments apart.New and fresh feelin overwhelm me when im wif her, touchin me to the depths of my heart, somehow or rather she nvr fails to cheer me up whenever im stressed. watever the future will hold, im hopin the best the i can be, givin her wat i can and providing a shoulder if she needs it. : )

self
wanna change song, but the power converter seems very very slag, dun noe y.causing me to be stuck ag and ag wif the same songs..wat to do, wat to do????

Meant to be...to continue..

2005-10-26T10:09:00.000+08:00

Intro
Finally able to update my blog alr, these few dayz bro had been playin Maple..thus not able to do anything abt my blog. Happened alot of things that i'd like to keep note on, but then juz did not hav the chance to put it down.

Work
There's been alot of enemity among the staff these days there.Had been thinkin whether or not to stay or go, one thing gd abt the place is that the staff are all very easy to get along wif, somemore the workin hrs are very flexible and i can work anytime i wan..Hav to wait and see wat wil happen..

Bike
She went for the 2nd servicing alr, felt better for her too as she can "run" faster nw, haha

the one???
Some1 i met while workin at choc bar, grace, whom im nw on very gd terms wif.. startin out everything and hoping everythin will work out between us, felt that closeness to some1 i had not experienced for a while. this feelin of sensation that drives and turns u upside dwn and yet comforts and protects u frm anything. It seems like we are always thinkig the same things and havin the same thoughts which greatly surprises me..haha! ENjoyed every moment wif her and hope she does too, but then i will hav to see whether or not she recipocrate my affections or is juz playin along wif me.. i feel she is serious though, even if we're onli startin out and everything seems fresh, comments heard are also not very nice, but i'll bear in mind these comments and see wat the future holds.all in all, all i noe is i like her, she like me, all things after that is secondary...

self
Lights are up in my life but then hav to balance between frds and her, otherwise not very for my future endeavors i noe..haha SORRY GUYS!!!

Back

2005-10-07T22:18:00.000+08:00

Hols
Nows the hols alr, finally can settle dwn for some seroius packin of my room(during the exams i've tossed all my bks ard!) Some more things hav to be done for my bike, and then some really gd rest!

Self
Doubts cloud my mind recently over things i shouldnt hav touched, made my resolve lower, but then im pickin up ag, hav to try to reach the goal i've wanted for my future, but then these things continue to haunt and haress me, irregardless of hw i face them..It is meant to be or else....

*Maybe i think too hard..*

The long wait.....

2005-09-14T22:59:00.000+08:00

Long Lost..
Was so happy yest when i read my email, there was a friendster message frm a gal.At 1st i couldnt see clearly who it was and i tot hw in the world would any gal find me??? Then i look closely at her profile and u now who it was??? ITS ESTHER!!! Hehehe! Had been wanting to findher but nvr could.. When i knew it was her i was soo elated lor! haha! Nvr tot she would mess me... But VERY glad she did.It sort of brightened up my whole day and brought a new kinda resolve for me..Though i must say maybe its onli a "hello" message, but then its better then winnin a hundred ToTos alr..HAHA!! Now wat im hopin for is tat she'll reply and continue with contactin,hehe, hope she does!!!

Sch
Exams tom and im prepared for it, now is to do the application part and score for it!!

Self
Felt better after seeing Esther's mess, its like a bulb suddenly switched on in my dark life... But then i shouldnt think too much and continue on wif wat is neccessary, tat is my studies 1st!! : )

""*Hav u heard abt the man who threw his mother-in-law into a pool full of crocodiles?
He's now being sued by the SPCA for being cruel to the corcodiles!! : )*""

Everytime!!!!!

2005-09-13T08:07:00.000+08:00

Finally able to update my blog, (this is in sch as my com is down AGAIN)
Was the 1st one(for students) to reach lvl5 today, was VERY surprised tat no one was here, even FJ was empty! But then maybe its because its 7.30 in the mornin and ALL IT sutdents ARE SLACKERS!!!(Hmm...maybe...) :P

COM
MY COM SPOIL AG!!!!! Why???? Why God is it ALWAYS me?? My com is down ag for reasons unknown, and there is weird sounds comin out of it when i wanna on it. WORDLESS!! Somemore my songs juz finish sortin out (juz like the previous time!) and my application all inside. Two alternatives i hav, one is to change the hard disk(which i dun think will help for long) na dthe other is to change the internet line(which i still hav a contract of 8 mths!) Y, Y , Y ????? Maybe its a sign frm God to let me stop oning my com and REALLY focus on my exams!! haha!

Sch
Exams round the corner, hopin every1 does well for it. Things happened and characters seen, experienced hav i alot of things i've not seen be4, haiz..maybe the fault lies wif me, and not others, or am i too soft tat others start to climb on top ...Time will tell....

Bike
Did a few modifications to her, got for her a belly pant, some stickers, an air horn. More familiar wif her alr, gettin used to her every sound and movement. Now all tats left to get is a full face helmet, but then it wil hav to wait till later..

Self
Had a talk wif vin and the rest tat day abt me gettin a gal in sch, i was also thinkin if i dun get a gal soon, after poly it will be very hard for me to really find one, so decidin really hav to find a suitable one be4 i graduate, but hopefully the one tat i approach will accept and not reject. Im so afraid of rejection now, though its the process of chasin gals, i feel my skin has gotten soo thin tat any further rejection my whole body would hav tore apart alr.... Sound so desperate, but then the dayz of loneliness is not sumthing i enjoy very much, so empty, cold and cuts like a knife...

Stopped smokin today, hope it will last... i noe i can, if i wanted to...

Tot of sumthin while inside this empty lab by myself...

**Is it all, for tat sumthing tat wasnt there,
or will there be one.. of which others cant see..
or can u apprehend, the mystics of wat is to be..
or rather wat can be done in the search for the unknown.
To be able to tell others where u've been,
sayin tat u hav really been there..Where all it leads is still darkness,
when one could not be contented and yet be fulfilled.
Contradiction is wat is..and wat will be..Look carefully..
See the wondrous life of nature fill the emptiness..
let not your weary heart yearn for the untouchable, but..
crave for tat which is juz within our grip, and smear our lives...
with the contentment one will not find if not for willingness....**

Good as new...

2005-08-26T04:10:00.001+08:00

Balls
Went to play billiard wif JJ at AMK, after a while Ming came, followed by Ling, Ti and his frd. Later on we went to Vin's place to wash my bike. The dirt on my tires are very ahrd to wash lor!! Spent a gd deal of my time washin it!!! After tat im all sweat and perspiration... But then after tat im VERY satisfied wif the result.. Gd as the 1st day i saw her!! Haha!

Bike
Today at the traffic light got two guys on a bike admiring my bike, was a little bit happy and filled wif pride for her tat sum1 was admirin her. BUt then... When its time for me to go(green light) I loet go the clutch too fast and the engine stalled!! WAS SOOOO pai seh lor, looked at my rear mirror and saw the same guys laughing, AHHHHHH!~!!!! PAISEH till no word say!!

Malaysia
After the washin we went "Da you"(after the cleansing must fill her up!), let her hav a FULL stomach then ehaded back. At 1st tot of goin supper or billiard but then the guys were tired alr. So in the end went to the kopitiam nearby my hs for supper by myself, dun wanna trouble them..

Self
Hope everything turns out well in the end, makin some amendments but if the worst comes, i cant do anything alr.. Feelin lost somehow, dun noe y??? Soo empty inside, none to trust, became so hard-up and cold inside, maybe because of the experience inside. Tat all i can trust is myself, wonderin wat other's motives are, wondering if it is gd or bad. But then this is not gd i noe, wat can i do??? Its not a few days in tat kind of environment, but a few yrs leh.. Tryin am i, to slowly come back to society, blendin in to the place, hopefully by then there's still some who stays by my side, hopefully...

**Realize tat no matter hw bad we feel in watever circumstances, others had it worse...**

Good as new...

2005-08-26T04:10:00.000+08:00

No Lessons!!!

2005-08-25T17:33:00.000+08:00

Sch
No lessons for thursday and Fri!!! Yea!! (Woke up late For thursday lessons so nvr go!) Can slp later, study a little, so many things to do for myself, hahahaha, gdgdgdgd! Gonna study for the 1204 thingy and also VB, been a little slag to do it but then hav been readin up alittle alr..
Yest did the 2201 test and presume i can do quite a bit of the ques given, test seems quite ok as i can do all the ques, but then dun noe if they are the correct ans anot!! Andrew told us the nite be4 to wake up early as the 3 of us always study alot the nite be4 and sumtimes nvr actually wake up for the test itself, but then HE OVERSLEPT FOR THE TEST! Partly because he set the wrong timing for his alarm clock, he set it to evenin 7 i think nad not mornin 7!! Poor thing hav to go and get an MC alr..

Sourgrapes
Been a little snappy these few dayz myself, maybe ate too much sourgrapes alr becoomin a MEGA sourgrapes KING my self!! Though i've got over it, seems tat i've past on the virus to some others in sch, till the class becoomin the SOUR class alr, hiz hiaz... Not noein the reason for wats happenin, but then i mean shouldnt continue like tat, otherwise very very bad thing will happen... No offence but then we all should stick together, and not hav "nei hong".. Nvr mind wat has happened, nay, after all its nth big, we forgiv and 4get.. haha, all the best for ALL our studies... (giv a smelly face and thou shall receive a smelly face, giv a funny face and thou shall receive it too!!)

Self
my PMS (hopefully) is over alr, haha, been wonderin and seein other ppl who hav more probs then me and hw thye could cope wif it and not me, nay, wouldnt be the normal one and sit and sulk but must try to ovecome and conquer it, im not a loser, nvr am one, nvr will be....

""*He is no fool who givs wat he cannot keep to gain wat he cannot lose*""

Happy dayz..

2005-08-22T03:49:00.000+08:00

Work
Gotta work next week alr, partly because of the extra cash and partly because felt an obligation to help the guys there. Not because if im not there they cant finish their job, just tat i can also destress myself and also giv them a helpin hand.

Sch
Went studyin wif JJ today, next weeks' got test comin and prac test the week after next.. Somemore after 2 weeks is the start of the exams alr, must really study hard to score for it..

Self
Went "da you" wif the guys..JJ introed me to 2 of his frds who were very frdly.. They reminded me alot of my past frds..... Memories of the gd and bad flooded me whenever i tot of it.... Haiz

I tot i could control the inner self, but then in fact it was it who controlled me. Somehow its true when they say tat "a leopard will nvr change its spots", change was clear in me, but then its not change, its juz compressed into a deeper part of my heart, waitin for the chance to escape and return to its true form, i've kept it locked till nw, but then i feel im losin my will against it..slowly and yet steadily it takes control.. tryin..Hw can i break free, help me....

Im not wat i used to be anymore, evolved frm the 2nd stage and into the 3rd stage, where will i be, wat will i become, none noes.. My vision of the future is gettin bleak, but i'll try, not for my sake..but for my next generation....

**Most barriers in life is man-made, and...more often then not, we're the ones tat made them..**

Noah's Ark

2005-08-21T18:12:00.000+08:00

Lessons to be learnt frm it
-Plan ahead, it wasnt rainin when Noah built the Ark
-Dun listen to critics, do wat is nessary to be done.
-Build on high ground
-2 heads are better then one
-Speed isnt always an advantage
-The cheetahs were on board but... so were the snails.
-if u cant fight or flee, FLOAT.
-Take care of the animals as if they are "the last ones on the earth".
-Dun forget tat we're all "on the same boat".
-When things start to get deeper, dun juz sit and complain, SHOVEL.
-Stay below decks when the storm comes.
-Dun forget tat the Ark was built by amateurs, and the Titanic built by professionals.
-No matter how bleak the situation is, there's always the rainbow at the horizon.
-And, the most important thing, dun miss the boat.

Shoppin spree stopped

2005-08-16T15:28:00.000+08:00

Work
Holiday this week, gd for me cause i can rest and do my stuff and sch things. but then bad for my cooleagues down at the shop cause the schedule will be more tighter. Sorry guys

Sch
Studied for the tests this week, got 3 ah!!! Somemore got alot of sch things must catch up to, revision also needed to be done as exams are really ROUND THE CORNER!!

BIKE
GETTING more in tune wif her, felt better whenever i took her out for a ride and just bring her go "tou feng"..Forgetting everything everytime i relax and enjoy wif her... HAHA!
Somemore tomorrow goin boy and auntie there to buy a few more "accessories" for my baby to "ai mei"!! : p
TOM ALSO GOIN !ST SERVINCIN ALSO<. HAppy, happy, happy!!! Cause can go a little bit faster alr, so the Wespas and the "Lao Ks"and the Phantoms cant overtake me alr!!! hahaha!
(And... this is for Vin, the slowest S4 rider WILL be goin faster alr!!!)

Self
Got for myself a new pair of sandals yest, went to Bugis wif Vin, Lin, Michelle and Liyan. Went to a few shops and finally stopped at the Beetle Bug shop, got a few designs and finally saw a pair which i liked alot, got and also was happy when my mum told me tat the sandals are very nice!!
Nearly got alot of other "barang barang" cept for the fact tat Vin stoppped me! Otherwise i'd hav got 2 bags, jeans jacket, shoes, long sleeve, shirt liao.... Thkz man, no need to waste $ alr!! HAHAHA!!!

**L.O.V.E == Lots Of Vexing Emotions**

Holiday!!

2005-08-15T04:59:00.000+08:00

Work
Next week no work,can concentrate on the studies alr. gdgdgd!! : )
Today got a new colleague come to work today, he's taller then me lor!!!
Su Mei and Manfred they all today kept makin fun of each other today, very funny!!
Ester also came by to help out! (nice of her!!) Was a little angry wif Felix, cause he was somewat annoyed abt me servin the wrong cup for the coffee, i mean i serve wrongly serve wrongly lor, wats the point of rattling here and there abt the mistake, IM HUMAN!! HELLO!!! He also makes mistakes once in a while mah! Lol!

Studies
JJ, Gui, Vin, Lin came over to study for the 2106 quiz tom, very shagged alr but lucky they got come over and teach me hw to do, otherwise i gone case alr! thkz Everyone!!! Went to Malaysia to "Da You" also, haha!!

Bike
This week maybe go boy and auntie there to get some accessories, hav to see the rest!!

Self
Study, control and find a suitable one....

**We can do no great things, only small things wif great love....**

Waitin for run-in

2005-08-11T23:53:00.000+08:00

Sch
Seeems like all of us are very slagged abt the pro thing, sch work also gettin to be a drag, but then im pushin myself forward everytime im slackin, hard but goin slow..

Work
Cant giv too muych time for work alr, exams comin nearer and nearer, startin studyin on my own alr cause vin they alll everytime not free..

Bike
Waitin for run-in, cause everytime im like very slow like tat! Vin say im the SLOWEST S4 rider he's ever seen so far! Haha! I scared my bike hurt mah!! Wait till run in then i'll try to fastn up!

Self
Happy, yet sad, joyful yet stressed, how comtradicting can humans get, u tell me!!

**Noe urself, find ur self, fulfill thyselves..**

=)

2005-08-08T05:14:00.000+08:00

Work
Everything still goin on smoothly i hope.. Everyone's funny as usual, they are always makin me laugh and stuff which is gd.

Sch
Buckin up as i noe my grades are not so gd now. Exams comin also. The study grp must form ag.

Bike
Soooo Shoik the bike, brought her to Changi Village and Airport rd today, Feel so gd when i bring her out, its seems tat we can go anywhere in the world and conquer anything when im wif her..haha.Gonna treat her WELL!! B)

Self
Looked at the sea today and solved quite abit of probs i've not been able to solve lately, softened my burden alot today, thkz to the guys tat brought me there.. Objectives tat swayed moved back in place ag for nw...

**Beauty is in the eye of the beholder....**

Continuing...

2005-08-03T22:01:00.000+08:00

Blog
Nowadays busy doin the bike thing, when i actually got the time to do the blog thing, bro wants to used the com... Today must blog a little, otherwise will "gu fu le" Jane's "ku xing"!!

Sch
Alot of things happened in sch, cokes tat had filled up wif gas nearly broke out ALL OVER THE SCH!! Haiz, y cant we all be like the supermodels in "Miss Congenality" and WANT WORLD PEACE????? Lol! There are bound to be ups and dwns in ANY relationships, but then we all hav to giv and take(this applies for me as well!), there is no perfect love in the world. Fortunately the sotrm has blew over and everythings fine alr(I hope). Everyone plz try to accomodate wif each other and remember Miss Angeline's FINE tutoring!!

Bike
Waitin for my bike (Y ISSIT SOOOOOO SLOW!), got the accessories this afternoon accompanied by Vin, JJ, Gui, Pearline, Ying (thkz guyzz) They all got me a gd offer also(compliment of Gui). All in all spent $120 on the stuff, still need to spend abt $70 for the cleanin accessories. Should be fine i guess, must really take care of "her" when she arrives!!

Self
Controlled my self well these few days, learnt really tat if u r stressed u should go and help sum1 in need, it destresses u somewat and cools u dwn somehw, learnt also to let some things go and take some back in return....

**When u love someone, u've gotta learn to let them go...**
(Nice chorus of a song, cant find it though. Wasted!!)

Exhausted.

2005-08-01T00:04:00.000+08:00

Bike
Woke up this mornin wif bad news slammed rite unto my face, but then im goin to continue no matter wat might happen....

Self
Soo tired this few days, emotionally and physicaly drained, hols should be to rest both, instead i used most of the reserve! Lol!

2nitez' a clear starry nite, the stars finally appeared, the winds embraced those who noticed them, the grasshoppers and frogs in the enarby field groaned abt the injustice of the world, and the street lights showed the way for the lost. Comforted (sort of anyway) by these sights of the night tat few ppl ever notice and appreciate.

**Believe in yourself and in your plan
Say not i cant but i can
The prizes of life we fail to win
If we doubt the power frm within...**

Shagged...Confused...

2005-07-31T04:25:00.000+08:00

Work
Was supposed to go to work today but i didnt go. Reason..not because i do not wanna go, but is because i DID NOT NOE THE F***ing SCHEDULE HAS CHANGED!!! When i saw it on Sunday, the schedule for mine was onli for tues, then today Felix called me and said i am workin today! LOL! I didnt noe lor. He said tat i had wanted to work tues and Sat, so he put me these 2 days, then i say how come the schedule nvr put, he sayhe tot he noe tat i noe im workin on these 2 days. I mean, hw am i supposed to noe rite, the scheldule put one day so i noe one day only lor, am i supposed to go and see everyday to check whether my schedule has changed anot, if so, shoudnt the one changeing it inform 1st. Im really irritated lor, though workin there all the ppl there are mostly very nice to me, the prob tat i realize is tat they are tooo SLAGGED, Dun care attitude. If u do not "CLICK" wif them, they dun care nuts abt u! In the end nvr go work, casue Felix say he'll find a replacement, he sounded angry, but ITS not my fault lor! WTH! I dun wanna argue wif Felix over this because the bike is comin, and i will need the $ for the instalments and stuff, cant afford to go lookin ard for another job, besides, i liked the job itself, enriching and can meet up wif all kinds of ppl. I noe tat they will definitely say all types of things one, but then i will hav to put up wif it, at least for the time being....Spoilt my whole afternoon Because of this////

Revision
Came out wif JJ to study for a while, after that Ti came by and we conversed for another while..

Self
Made up the hooks for the helmets which are comin in, everything looks ok nw waitin anxiously for the bike thing to be settled...waiting, waiting, waiting....

**Nvr look dwn on a person, unless u are goin to lift him up....**

Rounding..

2005-07-30T03:52:00.000+08:00

Amused
Went to the toilet at Sembawang mrt today, saw a little boy abt to the hieght of my hips pressin the water tap for the water, i watched for a while and find the way he was doin it amusing, cause those taps where u hav to press one is juz press once and let go rite? The boy pressed it for like 10secs be4 washin his hands wif it, i went over and helped him press, at the same time askin him y he pressed the tap for so long then wash his hands. His reply was he tot tat if he press 1sec and the amount of water is tis much, then if he rpessed it longer then the amount of water will increase also, then he pointed out (when im pressin the tap for him) "U see! u press the tap for so long, the water so much alr lor!" Soo cute, so naive...

S4
So excited abt my bike tat i woke up at 8plus today! Juz coudnt get myself to slp, tot it was too early to call the rest of the guys so slept ag till 10plus, then still felt too early slept till 1plus Vin called, TOTALLY excited, went to bathe and went dwn to meet them, JJ overslept and didnt wake up till we gave him alot of calls! Went 1st to Boon Siew and then to Mah Motors, All in all still tot the Boon Siew guy convinced me better then the Mah Motors guy..In the end next week tues latest wed will go dwn to buy the bike alr, then latest the week after next's wed will get the bike alr! Happy, Happy, Happy!!!

Touring
Went to fetch Vin and Pearline go bring my bro hm frm his western stall at CCK, showed them my old hs and also some of my old hangouts, old memories flooded in......

Self
Felt empty these fews days, lackin in sumthing and growin in sumthing, tryin to reduce all these emotions but they always get the better of me.. Why do these things ALWAYS happen to me, cant U juz giv me sumthing less complicated!! LOL!! Y must U giv me these situations when i will always choose to forgo and wait... Y????

**Be thee naive as a child, wif the innocence of children fill every1 anytime and everywhere...**

Comin nearer..

2005-07-28T23:44:00.000+08:00

Project
the guys came over ag vor the pro thing, worked for a few hrs then all of them tired and slept on my bed (most of them anyway!). Finished abt 6plus, vin went 1st cause Abel's birthday, then Ying as Gui comin to fetch her, then JJ cause he went for his audition (All the best!), then daniel cause he's meeting his frds, then the 2 gals. Still need to finish the DBMS thing and the TCP/IP group thing, dun wanna cram up everything till the exams, not gd for us all! Still thinkin whether Sat wan them all to meet up ag, maybe..

T-plate
Vin's takin off his undies tom, should be happy huh! Happy for him too, but hop ehis takin of the class 2a will not hinder his sch work and stuff, may he pass everything once, smoothly, if it is destined to..

Bike
Tom's goin to see the bike and ask everything abt it alr!!! Happy! Tom gotta confirm alr cause next tues will go buy alr, cant wait for it to come, so many things wanna do and share wif it!! hAHA!! Hope i'll get a gd deal..

Self
Wanting to reduce the ciggys, but ended up smokin more and more, i onli smoke when im stressed, so why am i soo F***ing stressed when there seems to be nth for me to be so...

**Why do ppl find love.... To complete their incomplete lives....**

Waiting.,..

2005-07-28T23:00:00.000+08:00

Work
Thinkin i cant go for work next week. : ( Cause i've gotta settle the bike's things and do not noe when the bike will come, really cant wait for it to come!!!

Project
All the guys came to my hs yesterday, quite ok as Irvin helped me to find out the problem why i cant install the Rose thing into my com. Thkz man!
Worked for like one hr onli and they all were like getting sleepy alr. LOL! (Tats the reason why i ALWAYS cant wake up on time!) Cause they were alll doin on my bed (Which took up abt more then 3/4 of the room!) AND ALL OF THEM FELT SLEEPY!! haha! Finished abt 8plus 9, shagged.Then gene called and asked me to go ECP, went wif Irvin and Gui to see the batt-controlled car, priced abt $69, but plus everything abt $100, still considering cause was thinkin if i get tat one i would not hav the time to play it also...Somemore hav to save some $ in case the motor instalments cant pay! After tat went to vin's hs dwnstairs and talked abt the S4 for a while, maintanence and stuff.. gdgd : )

Friends
Sharon's not feelin better i noe, but then tryin am i to help, prayin and hopin she'll get better frm it, and evolve to be a wonderful lady! Kampatei Kudasai!! Im here for u, bud!

Self
Bro keeps usin the com to play his online pool(like the time i played maple! haha.) But then therefore i cant use the com and update my blog, this blog im doin is in sch ok!! Lol! Haiz! Hope he faster get his laptop, otherwise he everytime play tat game also dun "zhi dong" one, volume noe im slpin alr the volume still switched till very loud, after i tell him to turn dwn then he do so, no consideration at ALL, period!
Have very funny dreamz these fews days, dun noe if they are a premonition of sumthin yet to be or simply a dream, sometimes i hope it will become real, hopin so much. But then, if it becomes real.......
Alot of things i'll be getting for next mth, so many things hav to take charge for alr, May all things work for the best for those who deserve it..

**The flowers have grown,
replacin the ones alr wilted.
Seasons passed, bringin wif it
the old surroundings and warmth.
Newer, more fresher ones had grown,
more outlasting, more worthy of praise.
But one could only view frm afar,
the flowers tat had grown on another hill.
Still, beautification is within tat hill,
where one of thousands exist.
Flowers, Trees come to this barren hill,
fill it with fullness and pride tat once had been.
Bringing feelins of humanity,
fruits of joy, warmth and continuation.
Fill all the hills wif their own unique colors
tat stays in harmony wif Mother Nature.**

Finally...

2005-07-25T01:16:00.000+08:00

S4
Finally able to get the S4, but then it is a new one which is Spec 3, a little costly but as my parents onli believe in 1st hand no choice.. Now hav to think of the accessories i hav to get for it alr, somemore hav to get a full face though will wait a while cause irvin they all say wait a while 1st be4 getting the full face..The bike shop will be giving me 2 MHR white helmet, gd as my bike will also be in white, Fri hav to trouble vin they all to go wif me to MAH motors and also Boon Siew(The place where im gettin my bike) to see if they got giv anything extra to us anot, cause vin they all think that i kana (cheated) alr cause as a person buy 1st hand normally the bike shop will giv alot of things one,but then this shop giv little only, so hav to see Fri hw...

Vin they all took the trouble to come to my place to pass me the Bleach CD, but then in the end the disc still cant play, maybe hav to find one day go his hs to wach alr..haiz///..

Work
This week sort of rest week for me cause i onli workin tues, the rest of the time will be spent on studyin and stuff..

**Anything u wanna hav to hold, u've gotta let sumthing go....**

Help given...

2005-07-21T12:30:00.000+08:00

Work
Twins came to help us today, one of them was an ex-staff of Choc Bar, all i noe was was one of them is called Esther, the other one not very sure, but then glad tat they are there to help.Somemore they are very funny also, kept makin jokes and laughing ard.. : )

Sch
Larva Queen blew up today, maybe its because of PMS, maybe becuase of wakin up on the wrong side of the bed, maybe....maybe....

Personal
Tot of so many things today, while havin my break, lookin thru the seas, the buildings, felt tat sumthing has changed, sumthing shifted, so heavy a burden and yet so fragile...

****It has been a fleeting memory, a feeling past ages ago.
Long has it clung unto my heart, so close tat i can hear it breathing.
Yet so far it escapes when capture it i try.
Nevertheless, i've grown to let it go.
It stays, however by my side, nvr failing to push me on,
Whenever im slackin, stoppin, or wantin to let go..
But wif it comes the pain of the memories, warmth and respect.
But goin on im tryin, preparin for another empty slotin my heart,
next to the one tat cant be erased, but as important and special.
Nth ever stays the same, nth will, ever.......**

Ups and Downs..

2005-07-20T01:10:00.000+08:00

TP
Passed the test!! YEAH!! So "kan qiong" lor! At 1st the TP instructor must verify our name,ic and birthdate, when my name was called, i went up and said my name and ic smoothly, then when he called me to say my birth date i was "kan qionging" until i actually 4GOT MY DATE OF BIRTH!!!!! I was like "huh..huh..huh..."LOL! Before tat nite also, was anxious abt the test tat i actually dreamt of driving thru the circuit!!! But glad i passed everything ... : )

Frozen
Accounts been freezed by parents cause they say wanna standby MY $ for MY BRO'S business!!
No words say..... Mums acc is used for my relatives' wedding(2 of my cousin' getting married), Dad's acc for home usage. Then she told me tat if i need $ ask her for it... Haiz!!!! Spec 2 hav to wait liao...

Work
today i "kallang kabo", was refillin the drinks when the lid fell off!! The customer practically shouter(its a gal), i was soo embarressed and kept apologising, but then she said nvr mind nvr mind, making me feel even badder!!

Sch
!st test got excuse cause TP,2nd one nearly flunked it if not for the teachers help, but then its the 1st time i got the feelin of really dun noe how to start the test, hte 1st ques i jam liao, all the previous ones i can still at least do most of it but then this one, raelly at a loss, told myslef i dun wanna repeat the same mistake..
Irvin heated up because of this, poor thing studied for it but stilll he cant start the thing, hope everything will work out well for him, im sure he can one!!! KAMPATEI!!!

***We can only grow in difficult circumstances..***

Shagged....

2005-07-18T02:38:00.000+08:00

Work
Packed today, FULLY!! And all the plates and cutleries are like left all over the place...Totally tired! Luckily Felix told me to take cab hm, otherwise by the time i reach Sembawang i'd hav slept all the way to Jurong alr!!! Saw a Very swet gal today, BIG eyes and a very sweet voice, but she's wif a guy who doesnt giv a d*** to wat she's sayin..LOL! I felt like goin to the guy and tellin him to giv the gal some respect, i mean she's talkin to him and he's like dun care lor, These kinda guys must kana scoldin BIG TIME!!!!
Hurt myself while cleanin up today, i was too "kan qiong" alr and my thumb hit against the pionted edge of the metal cupboard! didnt noe it was bleedin till the cup(white in color) was stained wif blood!!LOL!! Now it feels numb...

DreamLand
Woke Ying frm her dreamland, seems she had pressed on my num accidentally and whnen i called back, she sleepily answered my call, my God, shouldnt hav recorded her voice, Sounded sooo damn sweet lor!! haha!!!

TP
2 days and counting... : P

Came back hm tired, shagged out and happy CAUSE ITS THE START OF A BRAND NEW WEEK!!!!

**Ever seen an angel? Its when a gal is slpin on the bed...
Ever heard an angel's voice? Its when her voice when she just woke up frm her slp....**

Busi all the way...

2005-07-17T01:33:00.000+08:00

Self-prac
Mistaken the 12.45 self prac as 2.40 one, so nvr go...wasted 27 bucks for charity...miss one prac liao, thinkin maybe mon book one more prac..still thinkin...

Work
Very busy today lor, 1str time doin Sat nite and the ppl were like comin in and comin in and comin in, outside there were still groups of ppl waitin...outside i saw one group very funny, not because they were funny but is because they came here wantin to eat the Fondue thing, at 1st they were all smilin and laughin and jokin, then after standin outside and waitin for like half an hr, all their faces pulled a long face, not talkin alr, juz starin at us, thinkin we'll go ikea buy some more space and furtniture for them to sit or somthing.i mean, its FULL HOUSE, wat do u expect????
After tat while we were all busy doin our stuff some gal took my pic wif her cam, i knew cause i looked up wonderin where the camera flash were and it was pointin in my direction(Im in a place in the store where u WOULD not take pic frm one, nth outstandin where im standin) Then the gals on tat table was like all looked dwn, even the one wif the cam, then when i went over to pour water(they were laughin and talkin), all of them suddenly became quiet and giggled and giggled over God noes wat!!!

Finally finished and went back early cause Felix alowed me to, Total SHAGGED OUT!!!

TP
Comin nearer and nearer, NERVOUS.......

EVerything's fine...I hope...

2005-07-15T01:08:00.000+08:00

Sch
Gui wore his new shirt today, soo envious lor! haiz!! ...
jane sudennly wnet back hm, dun noe y, but then after tat she said nth wrong...hope its true.
Grace got a new haircut today, looks quite nice on her, im also goin to get a haircut alr, hair too long, very awkward..Now i hop everything will be ok alr after consoling both of them, just wish for all of us to at elast TALK wif one another, tats all im askin, nth more...

Work
Jolene also got a new style today, she bleached her hais, nicer i feel, somemore today she put makeup, dun noe y???Seems to me she looked nicer and more attractive this way...Big eyes and a natural smile tat captivates ppl...Poor thing got PMS today, wanted to tell her to rest but she want to work..nth i can help cept try to help her in wat i can...

Self study
wanted to self study for a while but then gene called and he showed me he's new remote controlled car, its sooo damn cool lor, (will get it if i can, he's got slivia and supra, thinking i will get BMW or EVO) He told me not to get the EVO cause the other day an EVO BLEWED him, lol, i mean if u EVO alr y blow a civic rite??? Played wif gene and mandy for a while then wnet to meet jj and vin, we talked there lor, nvr study much...then i hav to go and fetch my bro at Teck Whye cause he just got a shop there(western food- he sort of one of the shareholders there), came back and got one more daughter!! Sharon!! haha, im a blessed dad!!

Somehw or rather im troubled, but i felt better after solvin others probs, maybe i'll continue to do tat, then revalation will come for me, the ans i've been searching for will slowly unveil.... i hope..

**Watever has happened HAS happened and IS MEANT to happen, wat matters now is the future, make it the best u can be, for urself...for others....**

Sooo nice...

2005-07-13T22:53:00.000+08:00

Self
I have been blind, unwilling. To see the true love you're giving.
I have ignored every blessing, I'm on my knees, confessing...

That i feel myself surrender each time i see your face.
I am staggered by your beauty, your unassuming grace.
and i feel my heart is turning, falling into place.
I cant hide it now hear my confession...

I have been wrong abt you, i tot i was strong wifout you.
For so long nothing could move me,
for so long nothing could change me...
You are the air tat i breathe, you are the ground beneath my feet.
Why did i stop beliving...in you...????

So meaningful and so true...
(Listen carefully to the song being played *Josh Groban-My Confession*)

Work
Boss came a while and left, seeing no customers, i went and made SOUFFLE(SOOOOO NICE!!!!!!!!) An american family came by and the little gal was sooo cute lor, she had blue eyes, sweet smile, and a very SWEET voice! She said thk you tat melted my heart(My day brightened up when she said tat to me!! : ) )

Sch
Getting more complicated everyday, dun noe y..Gues nobody care abt anybody anymore, y cant consideration and peace be wif us all the time??? I want peace and harmony to thrive, but tat seems so hard to manage, stressed, sooo stressed...Maybe tooo F***ing nosy of me to poke into others business, but then it hurts to see your frds slashing each other wif knives(describing only), trying, still trying...

Frds
Must find someday to meet up wif Sharon they all alr, been sometime since i met wif them, tat day Sharon called me go fishing but i nvr reply, paiseh alr...Must really find someday to go out ...

**Put urselves in others' shoes, how will you feel, the world isnt made up of u only, understand y actions are made this way and how the outsome will be if something is done in one way or another...Listen, when you got 2 ears, and let not ur tongue slip mindlessly, if it is 1 by itself...Seek to be together rather then be hurt all the way, for nth gd will come out of it if it stays in this way.....**

Inner confusion...

2005-07-12T02:53:00.000+08:00

Sch
Everyones dwn wif either sickness of the physical body or of the inner body(heart and feelins).
Very hard to cope wif the all, dun noe y alll these had happened, but hope everything will turn out fine in the end..

Jam
Went out wif irvin, jj, pearline, gui, mel and ti today for guitar session, played quite ok and maybe helpin jj to play in his voiceout thingy..Hope i wouldnt do too badly and dissappoint him..
Talked wif vin and pearline abt goin overseas for a trip and maybe goin, who noes, still hav to confirm wif Sharon they all 1st see they wanna go 1st anot...Tat time promised them alr still havent go...

Western Food
Bro got a stall sellin western food sharing wif his frds, its the same stall tat i'd worked in while in my sch days (At cck teck whye there). At 1st mum nvr telll me to share wif bro cause shes afraid i might get in touch wif the past frds and get into trouble ag, some of them are in tat same kopitiam as the stall.. I mean, if i wanted to go back i'd gone back by now rite, instead of waitin for soo long...LOL...now wasted my chance of becomin boss for once ...

Feelins
confuised, but gettin myself together bit by bit alr, still hav to find tat missin link to me....will find it someday i hope.. : )

TP
TP's next week! Dun noe wats the outcome, but hope everythings turn out fine... Then hav to decide when i can acutallty get a gd bike...

**Seek not to hav more enemies then friends, cause u nvr noe when u will need their help, and them urs...

Shagged...

2005-07-11T02:12:00.000+08:00

Work
Alot of ppl today, fully packed and by the time i noticed it, its time for me to go hm alr. My resolve for the S4 is getting stronger and stronger cause everytime i'd to leave early and let Felix they all do the closing cause i hav to catch the last train. If i hav a transport then i would not hav to worry abt the MRT thing alr.. really hate troubling and relying on others to do my own stuff!!! Nth i can do til i pass my TP..
Felix they all very funny today, they were cursing today, but then wats so funny is tat they replaced the actual hokkien vulgarities wif english ones, an actual translation frm hokkien to english! I'd a gd time laughing!!
Noticed something in work, its tat i've found out tat of the foreigners tat came into our shop, the French and the Germans are either the most friendly or the most beautiful ones(gals), they hav the most beautiful smile and i feel tat the French language is the most sophisticated one among the languages i've heard, said wif such grace and clarity(though i dun noe wat they are sayin now of course!) but then it seems so soothing to ones ears!!..

Feel im getting fat alr, must start exercise alr(stopped for some time alr), wondering also shall i cut my hair anot, hmmm... Need to buy a pair of jeans too, and boxers(the levis ones which dad got for me feels very comfy!! :P)... But then need to budget cause hav to leave a little for the jamming thing, Self-prac, S4, expenses...so on and so forth...
Cant believe im smokin a pack of ciggys for 4 days!! well, must continue wif this rate..haha, gd also for my health and wallet.. I must get thinneer and my wallet must get FATTER!!

iM tired, shagged, ECP's callin me but im too tired alr...must really find the tim eto go there alr, strss lvls in orange light wif family, personal, sch(a little), friends...feeling maybe i shouldnt care abt others and F***ing do my stuff, not caring abt others.....be a fishmonger(selfish)

**When will it be mine, tat i can enjoy as others hav.
When can i be contented, when there's none for me left....**

Devil's Horn and Angel's Halo...

2005-07-07T22:33:00.000+08:00

Sch
One of my horns came out today during prac... tried to keep in in my head but then the lecturer pushed it too far alr.. I mean, ok if ur wife or someone doesnt giv u sumthing doesnt mean u hav to pull a "hit me in the face" look and keep on grumbling and grumbling and grumbling...Its my fault yes i dont deny tat, but its just tat i dun like ppl who play too rough to others..i dun giv a damn when im pissed too lor.. F****ing IRRITATED! Luckily the halo surrounding me managed to keep tat horn frm fully comin out and prevented the other one frm even comin out, LOL! Kept myself "quite" calm and managed to "speak" to the lecturer and not yell..but inside my heart was like thumpin very hard, just like the feelin of be4 u got into a fight tat pattern...lucky, lucky, lucky nth happen.. Left directly after he had spoke finish to calm myself and to prevent anything frm happening..not gd, im still studyin and cant afford to quit sch....not in my plan..
Poor Irvin got bored also and joined me outside the class, my bad, influenced him too, my bad...

JJ NVR go SCH TODAY (If u are lookin, this is because i want to EMPHASIZE ur ABSENCE)
HE"S a BAD BAD BAD BOY!!!

Work
Boringg cause no customers today, Rach was there too and we were both tryin to find sumthing to do and makin jokes and laughing at ourseleves and stuff, but glad i've her company cause she's made me laugh my head off and 4get abt the sch thingy...

Gene
Called Gene today and asked him abt his dianogsis thing, he said doc havent reply yet...but hope nth bad will happen cause the dianogsis is for the examination of the presence of cancer cells...
Praying for u Bud!

Wrote somthing during break today, while gazing at the sea and the skies...
***The blue skies, the salted seas, filled wif abundancy, filled wif bliss.
Overflows wif serendity, calmness and peace, any1 tat comes, it comforts wif ease.
the sea makes one feel comforted, the skies warmth causes one to be baffled.
How both had been my friend yet foe, been my reliance yet absorber of my soul.
Overwhelmed by it yes i am, forever by their side i will stand....***

Slowly but steadily...

2005-07-06T23:05:00.000+08:00

School
Absolutely late for class today, cant seem to wake up today... But then will catch up soon alr..

War of the Worlds
Went to watch the movie today, seems ok cept for the fact tat the supposedly mechanical aliens tat invaded earth died because of the very living tissues tat they had absorbed into them.(they were hunting humans and draining their blood!) Like the ending which said sumthing VERY MEANINGFUL!!(Below is the paraphrased version of my understanding) TRULY touched by it!!

After tat i went home and u noe wat, i created the one and onli ashed cigarette coke drink!! The story of this begun when Adam, (the originator) was walking home after seeing War of the Worlds and thinking abt the ending (he was carryin a drink frm the movie), he finished abt 2 thirds of the drink and wanted to throw away but there was no dustbin, so ,being the GOOD CITIZEN tat he is ( =p ), he held it in his hand while smokin. THEN, after smokin, he STILL cant find any dustbin so, BEING THE GD CITIZEN tat he is, he threww the cigarette into the half finished drink... Then while DEEP in his thoughts, he FELT thirsty and DRANK frm the same drink in his hand!! TADAH!!!!! Ashed Cigarette Coke was formed and drank by the originator!!! Wonderful!! PS :: DUN try it, sucks all the way!!!!

Glad i've seen the show, the last sentence spoke to my heart and awakened sumthing in me and cleared alot of doubts tat i've had...

***Humans were not created wifout purpose or reason, but they were formed in the hope tat neither in the living or death shall their lives be in vain...***

Better Man....

2005-07-06T02:53:00.000+08:00

Illness
Recovered well frm the illness, maybe its becasue im too tired tats y got sick, but now feelin better..

jam
Went jammin wif neo, irvin, jj and pearline today, though everythings still ok on the surface, we've got to practice and time is not a factor i 've abundantly..At hand i've got my sch work, work, Tp and personal affairs to attend to, considerin forgoin the jammin thing, but then still hav to see 1st....

PonTannin
We skipped the lectures today cause the modules taught are quite easy, went to bishan and ate coffee bean there, slag for a while and then went to sch ag for the java tut, lucky for me tutor helped me so i got to finish my tut alr, haha...

bike
gui sold his bike alr, gotta get a new s4 liao, haiz, when will it be my turn????

Fine
Tat day i was just tellin the others hw i've not been booked for a fine and then now in one week i hav 2! lol! no words say...

Feelin alot better and in control of my mood now, but then sumthing doesnt seem rite, dun noe wat it is, must find out sooner or later, or maybe issit because i dun wanna find out the truth...hmmm...

**Reality sucks....**

2005-07-04T23:10:00.000+08:00

Illness
The minor sore throat tat i didnt giv a concern abt had became a quite serious thing, maybe its because of my "engine overheating", now i feel shagged and restless and doesnt wanna do anything cept for slpin and resting , engine need to "overhaul" liao.. Been workin till late and then goin studying and then mapling and the continuing all over ag... Guess body cant take it alr.... Some more tom got quiz and i just studied a little onli... but now too shagged to continue wif it...

Maple
Been playin less and less of maple alr, no mood and no time...maybe its gd in a way, but then i want to reach at least lvl 40(now 39) be4 i pause for a while, otherewise like "yi pan yi pan" like tat..

Smoking
Nowadays smoked lesser and lesser also while outside, partly becasue no time and partly becasue dun feel like it..tooo ex also... Gd mah, lesser and lesser then MAYBE stop....(MAYBE)..

Haircut
Mel got a haircut today, nice and had the formal executive look if she dresses up....gdgd

Sch
Talked wif him today, guilty tat i felt tat way towards him after hearing abt his sad past, wanted to make up to it by conversing wif him more and accomodating.. hope he becomes someone great someday....Trying

**the greatest power of all is often simple patience..**

Tired...

2005-07-04T13:42:00.000+08:00

Le Coq
Happy tat i bought the Le Coq Sportiff bag, retailing at $69.. Its very gd to use lor! Can use itr if i wear little formal and can also use it for outdoor use or on the street use.. Worth it!!!

Work
Tried the soufflle today, its like a chocolate muffin with dark and white chocolate sauce on the inside, TOTAL HEAVEN!!! ITs very nice lor, though sellin for a price of $14++ for a muffin abt 4 inches in diameter.. Worth it too!! will try it ag, ABSOLUTELY DELIGHTFUL!!!!

TP
Week after next will be TP Test alr, hais, must work less and practice more, and hav to juggle all these between sch, wat a drag...

Went to work today, dun noe y so shagged these few days, wanting to juz rest for like erternity and dun move frm there.. Maybe its work, maybe its sch, maybe its others, who noes??? HAv a little sore throat now, maybe because of all the chocolate tat i ate???haha, Prayin tat everything will go smooothly frm here, for something ...for everything...

**I can do anything and surpass it, only if i try....**

Day of many happenings...

2005-07-01T02:53:00.000+08:00

Sch....
Poor Jane got food poisoning today and nvr went to sch.. Hope she feels ok by tom..Seems tat most o fthe modules are quite ok cept for the thoeratical parts, really hope everyone goes thru these well.. Glad for Mel tat she is changed for the better this sem, Previous sems are like a little Ap gal who always skip classes, but then this sem she is always puntual (for most of it anyway), givs us morning call (i was the one giving them morning call last sem, now im the one RECEIVING morning calls cause i CANT wake UP! LOL!) Truly like the DOVE advertisement she has "Changed frm an ugly duckling to a graceful swan!" Keep it up!!U will always hav our support..

Work
Wa actually quite spissed wif the boss today... Today alot of customers mah, full hs leh in the afternoon, therefore i work here work there, then later on i can manage alr the other gal workin wif me Rachel asked me if i wanted any help, i said no need cause i can manage alr, the boss heard it and retorted "Aiyah! He's acting busy onli lah" *Plz pardon me for all the language tat follows * Fauk man! the hokkien vulgarities nearly came out of my mouth! Blood alr(Meanin very angry)! I said the 1st vulgar word alr and was thinkin of tellin him to repeat wat he had said, and if he does tat, he'll hav 2 more colors added to his fat, chubby and GIGANTIC irritating face, namely black and blue!! Rachel saw tat i was nearly losin it and quickly replied to him tat it was really very busy especially for my side(im in charge of the drinks and fondue and Rachel 's in charge of the food) I went to another side and continued wif my stuff, totally FAUKIN IRRITATED!!! a while later Rachel came and talked and joked wif me, LUCKYily she's there, otherwise i'd had lost it alr!! THAnk You soo much!!! Wad a DAY!!!

Shooppin
was havin my dinner at marina square today at window shopped at Royal Sporting Hs, saw a Le Coq Sportiff bag quite nice, thinkin of buyin it, still considering...

**I'll change, i must....**

Strange..

2005-06-30T02:18:00.000+08:00

Work
Saw the boss today, but then he doesnt look abit lke a boss lor, i mean he dresses sloppily, looks like a China man and he's very stingy...lol, next time i become boss i DUN WANNA become like him like tat!! Like Mel always says..... Ewwww!!! And a big one tat is!!!

REXX!!!
Cousin came to take his clothes tat he asked mum to do for him, then i asked him whether can let me drive his rex(Subaru WRX) anot, he said "y not, take it lor!" WAHH!! i went dwnstairs wif him and he introed me to 2 of his colleagues, Charlene and Evonne. After tat i drove his car to Sembawang Park, the engine died for the 1st few tmes cause im not very used to it , cause the clutch is like very hard lor! Int the end he SHOWED me hw its done, i can tell u he went into the corner like nobodys' business like tat lor, fast but accurate!!
Get to try and listen to the turbo also, 1 thing to say... SHOIK Ah!!! (Though not as shoik as the BMW of course!!)
Went back hm, touched maple a little bit, then shagged alr, wanted to enhance my blog but then theres some prob wif the songs ag, hope its ok in the morin...

Better..

2005-06-29T07:25:00.000+08:00

Sch
Everythings goin as planned, though the part of me goin late was not in it! Seems the storm has gone for now...

Blog
Finally able to do a quite ok chatter box, find for very long leh!

Study
studied til like 4plus in the mornin for the testb\ but glad i did it cause understood a lot of things haha!

seems to me my blog is gettin shorter and shorter hmmm...

**Dawn has come for the ones in darkness...**

End of the month..

2005-06-26T00:15:00.000+08:00

Finally gonna be the end of the mth alr, anticipating TP, shopping, and starting of the prac lessons and tests in sch... All the best to all out there for these things.

Work
work was ok today, had not so many ppl but then in the nite alot of ppl came because of the NDP thing. One thing which really AWAKENED me though, was rushing to get the dishes done and was washing the fondue fork, washed too hurriedly tat half of the 2 sided fork abt 0.5 cm, went rite into my thumb and i went like eyse wide awake, body suddenly became more alive!!! TOTAL AWAKENING!!!

Temper
Been to the extent of losin it these few days, cant control welll my temper now..y? Maybe because of PMS... who noes!!??

**Help comes in the stranges places....**

Alot of items..

2005-06-25T06:20:00.000+08:00

Visiting
Went to Granma's hs again on thurs, they are very haappy to see me and filled me wif lotsa fruits and food and boy am i pampered!! lol. later on they calle ddad to pick yup durians (fav) and mangosteens and fruits they had bought, wahh!!heaven!!

Accident
Mel and Gui got into an accident causeed by a crazy-assed driver who knocked them and ran away, lol, hope he kana big big trouble wif the law...otherwise poor mel and gui looked so "ke lian" was so angry when i heard the news but nth i could do now, they went to see doc today, pray tat all goes well and nth is wrong, somemore hope tat gui wioll be able to sell his bike..

Jamming
Came out for guitat session wif Irvin, jj, pearline, ti, wen, clarence. Clarence let me drive his BMW 318I!!! IT WAS SOOO GD LOR the feelin! SHIOK AH, HAHAHA happy im so happy!! : p
the absolute feelin of oneness wif the car and hw smooth the engine is and wat feelin the car can giv a person...though came back 5plus, still very shiok and hope to get tat next time... fav man!!

BadMood
Someones in a bad mood today, despite cheerin her up, STILL in BAD MOOD, Hmmm.. wonder wat happen, anyway, cheer up k, nth is more beautiful then a smile in this world!!

**It takes abt 34 muscles to frown and only 17 muscles to smile, so if u are not thinkin of a heavil muscled face, PLZ SMILE!!! : )**

2005-06-21T23:08:00.000+08:00

Dun noe wat to write alr, i've actually written a blog and goin to post it when the page replied cant be sent, the whole thing just went bonkers and the my blog vanished into thin air! (HOORAY for the dun noe wat thing tat had caused this prob! LOL!) Now i hav to think wat to write alr as i've totally forgotten wat i've written just now.... Cant write too much hough, later Andrew will say i very "LOR SO"!!

Passed!
Finally finished all my pracs so now waiting for TP which will be in July 19. Hope everything goes well..

Someone to noe abt
Saw someone tat i had wanted to noe for quite some time but then did not hav the courage to actually go up to her, seems like everytime i wanted to go up to her my tongue would get tied up and then i would just freeze up and walk away as if nth has happened. Haiz totally disappointed wif the new Adam, loser!! Just cant muster up anything to say to her.....

Sensitivity
The guys had gave me quite a bit of gd console few days be4, though they might not hav realized it, they had given comfort and relief to me much more then they could ever think of! thkz man!

ECP(East Coast Park)
Wanted to go there tonite to be wif the waves and the nite sky but then time does not allow tat to happen, tom got a morning class.. : ( Somemore promised Mel tat i will be in bed by 11.30. (Im a gd boy ok!!) HAv to wait till the weekend comes alr..

PS : Hope all this isnt too long Andrew, i've shortened ALOT LOR!!! =p

Dun noe if i had posted this be4 but it is very meaningful....
**If only silence is the only way to end everything...**

One gd deed deserves another..

2005-06-15T01:21:00.000+08:00

Went to class late (ag!!), but then i feel sorry for the poor teacher, abt 1/3 of the class did not go for the tut, but then i can still understand wat he is sayin, tat means he is still quite gd mah...Got a bit satisfied wif java today, cause most of the codes do myself one! : ) But then also got help frm irvin, jj and jason also, thkz guys..

I PASSED MY PRAC 2, so happy i could KISS the instructor!! He overlooked my goin out of course in the bumpy course and also my putting of the rite leg on the ground (both of which are immediate failures to most instructors) Lucky, Lucky, Lucky!!! Finally able to book my circuit revision (tom) and also Prac 3 (tom nite) Happy, Happy, Happy!!! After tat i passed by the busstop overlookin the police station and saw an uncle sleepin there, when i reached his side he looked up and continued wif his sleepin, felt sory for him and approached him askin if he had eaten, he said no and i passed him $10 to eat. (He looked so "Ke Lian lor", no shirt, unshaved beard, slpin on the bus stop seat!) My heart really went out to him, told myself tat if i continue to slag next time will become like him like tat (not an insult but an encouragement to me, to call me to persevere on..) Really poor thing him...

Went back by the MRT and saw a couple which the gal looked very like Esther(but not), tot of her and memories flooded back, maybe wat Sharon said is true, still cant let go after these four and a half yrs, still think of her and had let no one else enter my life, Immaturity, stubbornness, perhaps i've not grown up yet, perhaps its just the way things are.... Left a scar that was put there to stay, a place where none can sway...

*It is but a fraction or time spent, a period of bliss that, far sadness went.
Left something permanent, yet fragile as a new born infant.
Used all kinds of things to replace it, but in the end none ever did.
My fault to let it all remain, it was mine, the cause of the pain.
Emptiness, sorrow is nothing to, the feelin of loss that i've been a fool.
Life goes on as it always will, humans change as they are frail.
Feelins doesnt and nvr will, end of life it then will heal......*

Sometimes honesty DOESNT help..

2005-06-14T04:39:00.000+08:00

Got to see OOPJV tutor today, seems quite stern and not appreciative towards other ppl's efforts (Wat a 1st impression!!). Bandaged Sharon's hand today, hurt it somewhere i dun noe where, ppor thing, must hav hurt her so... Jane nvr come today, haiz, somethings' gonna cause her everything if she continues like thiz. Nth i can do to help her though, she'll hav to finish it herself.

Went for my 2nd prac 2 today, failed the thing though. Did everthing smoothly today, but then the last round i took the wrong test route, i could've slyly turned here turned there to avoid the instructor so as to get back to the ending pt but then i went one big round which will pass by the instructor. He asked me "Why u go by here?" I replied,"Oh.. I overshot the route goin back." And then he was like,"huh? Overshot, tat means u failed alr....." Shtye man, if i'd known i would not hav told him liao! Nvr mind, think of this as Heaven doesnt wan me to pass so easily cause it noes something will happen if i get the bike now. : ) Anyway tom's the next prac, hope everything goes well..

Mum came into my room today, nth weird abt it cept tat she was half cryin while talkin abt dad's condition and dun noe wat she should do and all tat stuff.. I told ehr she should not keep on worryin abt it and just try to let dad go for the therapy and the stuff, told her im prepared to quit sch if the neccessity comes. She doesnt want me to though... After tat i confessed to ehr the learning of the Class 2A thing and told her i might be considering getting a transport, assured her tat my ultimate transport is a car but then a car's not possible for me rite now and to hav a transport will be better cause sometimes i need to go ECP(East Coast PArk) to destress i told her, Sometimes i need to be alone , just be with the waves and with the beach and just let them comfort me in ways no one can ever do so.. Told her i'll look out for myself and do the things necessary to do, but then its hard for me to really concentrate when im not letting my stress flow out (Maybe its an excuse for playin maple...) Sometimes its really hard for me to focus on one thing when everything comes together, clashes on top of each other.. I want to be gd, i've promised tat i'll be gd, and i've done it thus far, no way i backin out... but then i just need a space i can go to, to redirect myself back to where i must be...Haiz...

Wanted to do something for the family but guess now is still not the time for me to do anything, feelin so helpless... i cant quit now, not now....
Cant slp, dun noe y, been havin these slpness nites, thinkin of nth, yet everything, wat then is freakin bothering me!!!???....

*There's a time for everything, a place for all things under the sun...*

Total DISASTER!!!

2005-06-12T23:29:00.000+08:00

ARGHHHH!!! Went for prac 2 today, everything went smoothly and im even confident of goin into Prac 3. Then it happened.. all the courses i was able to go on without a hitch and then came the revision test route for us to familarise ourselves with the actual day test route. Went thru all the courses and it seemed ok til the shalom, a zig zag lane with cones in the middle for us to zig zag our bike thru...AND.. we're supposed to close trottle after each of the cones but then my bike touched a little of the cones and i panicked and turned the trottle all the way up!! My bike went all the way straight(seems nth wrong rite??).... ALL THE WAY TO THE BUSHES AT THE SIDE!! I PRACTICALLY went INTO the bushes!! in the end i landed on the grass with the bike on top of me lol.. I was thinkin to myself "SHTYE!! gonna fail this one liao, was so close to passin this one!!" In the the bike had to be pulled out of the bushes onto the road by 5 instructors..Quite a damage frm where i could see, the leg stand was broken, mirrors broke, tank little dented, and there were pieces which i could not discern wat they are. LOL! as if "kana" a major accident like tat!!! Failed the Prac and was told that i was goin well and tat the instructor was goin to pass me, but then i accident liao hw to pass me, Haiz......
At 1st i tot theres nth wrong wif me only juz a few cuts and bruises. Later when i reached hm and took off my clothes, theres not much injuries lah, wif only cuts to my face, cuts on my neck, bruises on my lower part of the neck, pain in my stomach, rite leg swelled up, cuts on my hips and chest......LOL... Now i like limpin a little here and there, and somemore i booked prac for tom.......
Parents havent noticed abt the cuts yet, somemore they did not noe i went for lessons(they always disapprove of my learnin motor), if they noe i got into an accident they will NVR allow me to ride a bike!! Lets hope everything goes smoothly now..

*Quitters nvr win, winners nvr quit...*

Welcome..

2005-06-12T00:03:00.000+08:00

Aunties and uncles came today to visit dad, hs like a fish market like tat!! Noisy, laughter filled the hs while i took the role of the maid attending to each and everyone's requests, washed the plates, poured drinks, went dwnstairs to buy things etc, etc...

Tidied room cause cant study with all the ruckus, after tat nth to do so mapled for a while...

Hope later on can study and will not fall aslp!

Tom's Prac 2 liao, lets hope will pass the thing cause i can faster go self prac and also be in time for the tp test on 12 july! if not dun noe wait hw long liao...

*Because u're used to it alr doesnt mean u hav to bear wif it,
when its time to let go its time to do so..
Why continue to hurt urself and refuse to go out of the comfort zone,
because if u come out, there will be better things in store for u.
Only if u try.....*

Photobucket

2005-06-11T22:31:00.000+08:00

This is a test post from Photobucket.com

Waiting..

2005-06-10T02:17:00.000+08:00

Went for tut but teracher nvr come, lol. i was early ok! At least earlier then the grace period given! After tat the few of us decided to hav breakfast at Mac, wanted to start on the VB thing but then we talk here talk there reach lab time for next lab lesson liao..After the sch, wanted to finish up my VB tut but then was jammed up at the coding part, i noe i juzt need a little bit more to finish up the thing but still cant complete it! haiz! y am i soo "lan" leh???

Went to Prac 1 little late, was anxious and nervous as im really not used to driving a bike, wats more a Super-4!! But then the ironic thing was i failed in the 1st time was because of my helmet and was not so gd in figure 8 and crak course, quite ok with e-brake and bumpy.Today figure 8 and crank course can but then my bumpy cant!! Somemore when the instructor was givin an example on e-brake, some of the guys there wif me kept sayin "lets hope he falls down, fall down fall down!"Bad! BUt then the instructor was very gd one, he taught well and was very friendly and nice,and of course cause he let me pass mah!! : )

Feelin im bonded by the mapling and narutoing these days, somehow im sucked into this black hole of slaggedness and cant come out, if this continues sure cant do well AG for the exam!

*The rain comes and washes over the lands,
the wind blows over the soft, silk sands.
Rain brings tears to all kinds of ppl,
Whether big or small, great or little.
Nobody noes the comfort it brings,
Or the disaster it can swing.
Rain is just like a comforter,
That brings joy but O so little.
I cant help but wonder so,
how it is my frd not foe,
There is nothing like it in the world,
On the lands that spread and winds that swirl.
It brings away my tears and sorrows,
And gave short comfort that it could borrow.
The smell of the rain always feel so nice,
which suffering and sadness cannot entice.
But sad to say, its a reality,
That the rain's short short, so temporary.
Thats how it is with our lives,
Where sorrows soar and happiness dies.....*

Friendly allies..

2005-06-10T02:04:00.000+08:00

Went to school late ag, cant go for lecture cause abt 20 mins late, so in the end went up to lab. Saw Sharon who was also late and later met Nas Who was late...so many frm our class, found out frm the conversation tat they were not so studious and innocent as i tot they were.. An angel with a devil's horn..Ironic..But all in all they are still very gd gals and hope they will score in anything they want..

Went to work today, before i actually went inside there, i went to the area overlookin the Merlion and looked at the scenery there, very nice!! gazed there and recollected how i came to be here in the 1st place, then tot abt the past and hw i've changed til now, well, i've got to "Kampatai" and work harder now tat dad's in this situation liao...There was this gal singing there (think its a rehearsal or something) She had an angelic voice and she has a very gd vocal, but then the thing that spoilt everything is tat she is shakin her legs while singin with a microphone with dozens of onlookers watching and admiring her songs, Image TOTALLY spoilt! wasted...Tot it would be better if she sang with a table covering her legs!!
Colleaugues were very helpful towards me,very GD!! Although today is a little bit busy, the job seems fun and the time passes by very fast. Even though i've made some mistakes, i guess overall its still a very nice job for mew to get, now's hopin next week wil get more days to work..savin up for the SUPER 4!! Somemore the TP went to 12 July liao, haiz, dun noe by the time i can book for it will become when liao?? thinkin maybe end of July..

Hav to really buck up and start studyin seriously liao, these few days like a little slag.. cant slag for too long, otherwise exam com sure die one..

*There is a name called love, who helps those in need and strengthens those who are in bliss...*

1st...

2005-06-08T22:37:00.000+08:00

Went to sch very late today, class at 8 i 8.45 then go, luckily the teacher VERY gd one. He marked our attendance and also taught quite ok for me. Everythings' seems fine with everyone still lookin fine, lots ppl wearin contacts today, Sharon, JJ, Grace, Chermaine.. All "Ai Mei One" =p.. But then the contacts are very nice lor, must get them someday liao, these few days too busy..

Tom's goin work liao, wat will it be like.. hmmm.. lets hope everythings' goes well.

FAILED my practical one today, shyte! the helmet is toooo tight lor, and tat is the biggest liao, (large), instructor say got XL but i cant find a single one !! Think next prac (Fri) will hav to wear own one liao, lazy to bring frm hm to sch and then to prac, somemore gotta bring elbow and knee guards tat they hav given us free to wear, troublesome ah! The helmet tat i wore today at 1st is all rite, but then it feels like my head is squeezed by a wheel clamp like tat and i couldnt concentrate lor, shortly after abt half of the prac has past i went up to the instructor and asked him wat he tot of my riding truthfully, he said im still not used to it and hav to come back ag, i told him if tats the case i wanted to rest early and dun hav the prac liao, told him abt the helmet and he said ok. Rested til they came back, wanted to carry on but too hurting liao...Wasted!

Was very angry during dinnertime, i slept lying on my bed abt 1 hr plus to 7, dinner was prepared and dad called me to eat, but then u noe rite, when u juz woke up u would wanna lie on the bed for a while mah. He waited for a while (mum isnt even ready yet!), and then told my mum tat dun care abt me alr, call me wake up dun listen, let me sleep for all i like. i mean wats his prob man??? he is sick i noe, but then he shouldnt say things like tat mah, f***ing pissed off! He say until like i dun care abt the family dinner and stuff lor, at 1st i wanted to use the lame excuse of oversleeping to skip dinner, then later on i finally went and had it, dad's like very angry for i dun noe wat!!! Dun wanna argue with him and quickly ate dinner and went back to rm... Haiz...Counsellor of others but fail in my area...

*Studious....hardworking....laziness.....boredom... what of them??*

Soo fast..

2005-06-07T01:53:00.000+08:00

Tom will be tuesday alr.. seems so fast. but for now all the things seems managable, lets hope it stays tat way..

Hung my DIY curtain today, seems quite nice and wanted to post it but cant cause the bloggerbot thing sort of rejected it, haiz, y leh?? Dun noe...

Tom's Dad gonna go to hospital ag, if his illness still doesnt improve he'll hav to stay in hospital ag...Mum's been kinda sad, can feel it but still feel so helpless that i cant do anything to do to this family now cept tat i study and pass the poly thing.. Grandpa and Grandma came today, went hm just as i came back, MISSED THEM SOOO!! Just loved them lor.. somemore they bought alot of fruits (their style), BUT they forgot to bring my fave longan. : (

Saw her today but nth i can do, been a helper of others but then total loss when it comes to myself, hw leh???? failure?wanna try?hurt others?hurt myself? Too much questions, no answers...

*You'll feel happy if the ones u truly like are happy, even if they are not by your side....(issit true?)*

No time..

2005-06-06T02:52:00.000+08:00

Spent the whole day installing most of the programs, but then left .NET and microsoft tools havent dl, no disc for them lol. DL this uninstall tat, didnt realize it was nite alr... practically no time to study for my things, but hey, my coms goin on smoothly liao ,i think.
Wanted to scan my com but norton WOULDNT START, keeps jamming up (PLZ dun tell me i've another virus or something ag!!) Hiaz, i giv up alr.....

Now my com's done, have to trouble ALL my frds for their songs liao, then hav to filter out not so nice one and really do a back up for all these.. wasted all my pics are gone... got some really nice ones..

Uncle Seng came by today to pass me the materials i needed for the insurance thing, but then now i juz need the comparison of prudential and NTUC, gotta search my namecards and find their num alr (wanted to use those agents which gene and bro recommended, but then they are too young and toooo persistent. No gd!)

Next Wed 1st prac! Finally..waited for very long alr..will hav to faster finish up the pracs (earliest TP is 21 June, must try to make it then).

Next thursday start work at Chocolate Bar liao, wondering hw would it be like, the ppl, the work there, the boss...lets hope everything comes out fine..

Been sensing alot of emotional baggage thrown here and there, guess Cupid's been flyin all ard shootin alot of arrows he shouldnt hav, but then being the Bobo Shooter he always hav been, he's shot some pretty well-aimed ones..(But somehow or rather he STILL MISSED ME!!! Must get him a pair of specs alr.....).

*Why look for love when there is none, why search for it when it declines to be found?
Why choose to be sad rather then joyful, to be loved rather then to be blissful?
What does Love actually seek, nth special, just for it not to be weak.
Why does one always hav to suffer, keeps quiet as if bound by a muffler?
Why is there always togetherness, when sometimes there is sperateness?
Is it rite then to be wrong, towards one of whom u seemed so fond.
Or is it wrong to be rite, in reality tat hurts and feelings not light?
Humans fall in love so easily, yet most always come out of it feeblely.
they noe the wrong frm rite of it, but the opposite they hav always did.
In spite of all tat has happened, towards the unknown none can fathom.
Noe tat true love can be found, and all who passes it be safe and sound..*

The beginning frm the end....

2005-06-05T14:47:00.000+08:00

FINALLY, I'm back to blog everything tat've happened during these few days of "Pon Tanning", and its not my fault lor! Dun noe y my com's ALWAYS so fragile and vulnerable, the hard disk sort of crashed when im mapling and DLing naruto...LOL! WHY? WHY? WHY does it ALWAYS have to be me, I dun care if its hackers or crackers or virus or horses or worms or cockraoches or insects or wtf! But then my computer DOESNT HAVE any TOP SECRET documents or mysterious files or acc numbers or MILLIONS of cash to take frm, neither does it hav sophisticated access codes or program files or antique things to steal frm, then WHY does it always hav to be MY computer tat kana all these nonsense????? I DUN SURF PORN (Honestly not now anyway =p), Dun DL frm kazaa, Dun go to any illicit websites and im FACKING SICK of DL ALL MY PROGRAMS frm scratch!!! ARGHHHHHHH!!! Wats more...I'VE NOT BEEN MAPLING FOR 4 DAYS!!! ARGHHHHHH!!! AND... I"VE MISSED 3 EPISODES OF NARUTO!!! ARGHHHHH!!!!

Whew! Finally vented out all that is needed to come out, lets just hope tat my com will be more "zhen qi tian" and become a funtionable and NORMAL com will do, dun expect much..
Took the trouble to go Sim Lim, bought a 40GB hard disk and a norton anti virus and then rushed all the way back to install all my programss.frm 10 plus install till 4plus in the mmoring, in the end cant take it anymore slept with com still on....gotta finish this blog then continue install ag.. headache alr..thinking of installin the .NET is troublesome enough liao.. Somemore bro gave me that face of "YOU! the killer of my pros and songs and stuff!" I mean its not really my fault mah, wat can i do if the hard disk decides to take a holiday???? (He did not do any backup for his 1st and 2nd yr's stuff and one of the pros is to be handed in in 2 weeks time...) Wanted to study today but guess this installation process will go on...luckily yest on the mrt to Sim Lim i got read a little...haha.

*A man who conquers his mind conquers all..*

Love...

2005-06-01T01:52:00.000+08:00

Siva came today, sorta glad to see him alive ,well and kickin..hope he will do well in watever he's doin...

Nth happened much, cept tat dad's been naggin alot lately, cant stand it liao...plus the things at hm and my personal stuff... still gonna survive all these things, treating it as a test against my perserverance against all odds...

*Love, a word undescribable, yet known to all.
Is it but a fraction of time spent wif the other one or a piece of hurtful memory longing to past.
How can one really fathom it, understand it, nay. It is to belittle it, to enable the deception of it to grow. But then how shall we acknowledge it? How to really use it to our advantage? LOve hurts , but then it heals too. It seperates some, but then it bring others together too.
What is it then? None will ever fullly comprehend it, for it doesnt seek to be understood, but more , it seeks to be felt and shared. Not askin for anything else but the growth and maturity of it. Only this way u will feel it, and it will embrace u. Dun seek to avoid it, for it brings none happiness, dun squeeze it and be controlling though, it dies faster. Be as the lightness of the wind and yet the firmness of a lion's grip while dealin wif it, it yearns to be inside the the same two hearts who've said "i loved u", and hopes to stay there. But humans, always doesnt wanna go out of thier comfort zone and face the unknown, how will then u noe? Be strong wif love ,and weak against each other. For the seperation of two souls is more hurtful then tat of the banishment to the 18th level of hell, the pain, torment, nth can describe it. And loneliness, the results of which u will get, will fill ur soul and heart and cause u more harm u cant think impossible.
Humans want passion, but failed in their commitment to the rite one, y? Is it because they are tired, sick of the present one, or because they wan a new love to remember how they hav felt in the past.. the soothing embrace of it... The fact is.. it will end
reality will sink in, ALL will face it. 1st comes the romance period, then the "sick and tired of u" period, the trial period, and the endurance period. What becomes of love? either it strengthens or it is casted.. Once u have lost it, then regret visits, y? .......Love, think wisely be4 u want it to come.........*

Beginning...

2005-05-30T04:46:00.000+08:00

Sch started today wif alot of the class having different looks and gadgets, comforting to noe tat most of them havent changed, tats gd..

Went to book my 2A today, determined to get to the TP test date at 27 june..must try...then after tat must think abt getting a bike probably wif the help of jj and irvin liaoz..

Went with Sharon to Swensens Orchard, one thing i can say is tat the service is not very gd there lor, i mean there were empty seats available and the staff were walkin to and fro wifout any1 attendin to us, a queue began to form and the ang moh in front of us took the initiative and went inside on his own! after tat the food came wifout any cultleries, wth! are we supposed to eat wif our hands. then the same thing happened wif the ice cream! Haiz. But then i supposed they are very busy and cant notice these small stuff....

Came back feelin a bit relaxed cause stress is beginnin to build up inside of me..Lucky for the destressation.. =p

waited for the dl of the naruto thing but it is so long can! in the end fell aslp wifout noeing it in front of my com!!

*Hav desserts when u are stressed(stressed inverted = desserts)*

End of Hols....

2005-05-30T04:31:00.000+08:00

Finally came the end of the holidays, wondering would it be a gd thing or bad....Spent the whole day givin a final tidying to my room and com and told my pair of hamsters (Mickey & Minnie) tat i wouldnt be so free to attend to them anymore. Uploaded a pile of songs into the Mp3 player and arranged the Tuner presets, packed my bag and prepared the clothing for tom, I'm ready to go!
Gd luck to all wif the studies and examz tat follows, all the best and "KamPaTei(Japanese for work hard)"!!

I "ma fan" Jane ag this afternoon wif the blog thin cause the song dun noe y i cant upload into the blog myself..Hiazz! Then everytime Poor Jane hav to put up wif my everlasting questions of why is it like tat and why cannot... Thkz man for the help!!

Bro called me to play wif his frds at OCC (Orchid Country Club), played till 3, lost $20 in billiard,cant believe im tat bad..

Watched the stars frm the kitchen, its another of my relaxtion places to sub for not goin to EC(East Coast), watching the stars at nite cools me dwn and relaxs my mind, just love the feelin of being together wif the stars and lettin them help me in watever situations im in..But..they did not giv me the comfort they used to giv tonite,m all seems lonesome tonite.....

Came back and mapled for a while and then eyes too heavy to play so KOed. Nitezz .

*Stars...a fragment of the light which gives us revelation and comfort in times of darkness...*

Revelation and relaxation...

2005-05-28T04:08:00.000+08:00

Went to work and there was not much to be done there, practically slagged the whole day!! Went to send a few purchased furniture with the drivers and also went Hilton Hotel to collect one normal long fridge and one ULTRA BIG fridge! Its abt 5 times the size of me or biger lor! After atat went back to the factory and slagged ard cause nth to do. While slagging, out of boredom i started noticing the way my colleagues were conversing wif each otherand i've noted dwn some VERY interesting things! Message they will pronounce as messe, bus as butt, office as opit, table as lable, box as bog, River Valley as Deepavali, don't as loan. Its not tat im mockin them or wat, but then after really concentrating on wat they're sayin, i actually burst out laughing..and they were wondering wth im laughing abt....

Met Gene, Mandy, Huishan and went Eski Bar at Boat Quay, considered 0 degrees bar but then its really not very very cold. Though its quite a change frm the normal pub, the music's not very gd as it is techno all the way! somemore though im a smoker the pub shouldnt allow smokin in the pub cause really very smoky there! There were quite abit of ang mohs there the ppl there were quite allrite. Drank a few glasses of Bourbon there and we shifted to a hall-type karaoke pub a few blocks dwn, we were reversing to a parkin lot when the car behind horned, i mean we were not very close lor! then the fella came beside us and point here point there and went away, Gene went like,"WTF! Wats his prob man!" I felt quite pissed too cause i mean if u are not comin to the place to find trouble y point here point there all tat stuff, makes one boil up u noe... Went to the pub after tellin Gene to cool dwn and we had wine(red) and played pool and sang song there, didnt like the red though, actually prefered white or champange. We sang like til 2plus then went hm. bathed and wanted to maple for a while, but then KOed in front of the screen!!

Boringg...

2005-05-27T23:30:00.000+08:00

slept til like 2 plus then worked up, played maple for a while then flipped thru the bks, after tat opened up com to tidy up the songs i hav inside because of the mp3 player, played maple ag..
Tom's my grandma's Birthday, but cant go cause got work.. no choice..

Boring, Boring, Boringg....even the guitar tat i sometimes play to ease my boredom cant comfort me...Haiz...Lacking something, or some1 here....

*The best is yet to be, the last of life for which the 1st was made...*

Preparation...

2005-05-26T23:48:00.000+08:00

Met with irvin, jj and pearline in sch to go buy books, there were alot of ppl there lor! Think alot of them are freshies..Hmm Thinking abt the time when i myself was a freshie... After tat went dwn to the auditorium and saw andrew, he seemed quite angry tat we came to sch wifout him but we told him we tot he was busy iwf his ogl thing. (Actually it is partly our fault nvr giv him a call..) He seemed quite hurt and then bade us gdbye to do his things. Poor thing! Cant do much for him anyway.

After tat we went AMK K-pool, had a stomach ache so called jj they all to play 1st, when im done they had started the game alr, so sat nearby and watched them play. But then flet very bored and Pearline also dun wanna play so i went a find a guy whose playin by himself, he seemed very pro playin 9 ball so i challenged him! BUt then we share punch lah! Playin only mah! Boys' frm CJC and he's waiting for his frds to come join him, had a very unique name called Dragg and he played quite well, said he previously had been in tournaments and im like , "Shtye! I must concentrate hard liao!" We played for abt 15 matches and he lost, abt 9 to 6. Maybe he is giving in to me , who noes?

Went back after tat and then i confirmed with my auntie abt the MP# player taat i wanted (Creative Muvo 512 MB with Radio!) Felt very lost and lonely and cant do anything so went window shoppin at sunplaza. saw a few 3 quater tat i like and wanted to buy it, but the sales gal say cant discount! i mean im not buyin 1 or 2 nut plannin to buy abt 4 leh. she said 19.90 is very cheap liao but i insisted. But she say cannot in the end bought one only. Later on i went upstairs to another shop and the auntie gave me discount of $4 on 1 pair of 3 quater shorts and t-shirt after bargaining wif her, well better then none rite! Then cheekily i went to the shop downstairs and purposely walked slowly and sort of showed the salesgal,"Hmmph! u dun giv me dicount i buy frm other stores more!" Bad Boy!

Been smokin more these days, dun noe whether its stress or wat but really feelin down, not noein wats botherin me....

*sorrow feels my heart, wif undescribable feelin tearin thru my whole body, renderin me helpless in the eyes of my enemies, who then hsall save me, i dun noe...*

Helpless...

2005-05-24T23:14:00.000+08:00

Removal went well today, went Westin Stamford Hotel to take some pillows and mattresses. Atfer tat went back to the factory and stayed the whole day there. frm 4 pluz til 6.30 slag. gdgd! Frd wanted to intro a gal of his to me but i rejected it. He said she's my type but i was wondering, i cant cope wif one more thing wif alll the situation im facin...Haiz... hav to postpone this til a later data liao..

Talked to my frd abt getting the super 4 thing and he recommended me his frd whose not goin to drive his charade anymore, i hav to continuw his instalments and then drive the car. talked to a few of my close frds and maybe goin to take it frm him, though it might be an old car but its still a form of transport.....Thinking....

Met wif one of my frd, lun, and we talked for a while, his not been workin and i gave him $50 to pass over the moment. told him to find a job but his always, "okok, wil find one lah."
he's 30plus alr and stil doesnt noe how to think! wat if his gf now wanna get married or something and then wat if he got kids or something? Cant he think a bit further! Wanted to help him but very tight on my side ....

Talked to dad abt his situation, told him tat if the worst case senario was to happen, i will not continue studyin and work full liao to support the family and my bro's sch fees. He cried...dun noe because he was touched or because he felt helpless, well... nth i can do cept to wait for the medical report. : (

Timetable came out alr, Haiz.. 1 week later gonna start sch liao.. Its gd in a way, faster finish it faster go out and work liao..

auntie gave me a price tag of $141 for the 256MB FM Creative MP3 player..asked irvin and sharon for their veiws and they gave the green light, but then still considering the benefits and if i would really need it.....

Was sad these few days, dun noe y, feel soo helpless, so lonely and pissed off over the minute details..stress? loneliness? cant say for sure, but i feel im gonna break down soon, i always try to care for others probs and stuff but who wil care abt mine, who can be there for me when i really need her....i dun wanna trouble others though, tats y im always cooped up inside of me and nvr turn to any1. Been thru too much experiences to really open up to any1 now....But i must try to go on... for the family i hav now, and the future one tat i wil hav.....

*It hurts..... when u are alone....*

Relaxation..

2005-05-23T10:15:00.000+08:00

Grace's birthday today, went wif irvin and jj to sun plaza to pick perfume for her, saw cool water ( for ladies, maybe goin to buy it cause the one at home used finished alr, very nice smell, i LOVED IT!) Went dwn to Marina South to meet up wif drew and the gals. Chose a place outside tat is overlookin a bunch of great lookin cars(integra, airtrek, mr2 alike ect), had steamboat then went bowlin, but then the bowlin alot of ppl so in the end hav to go play billiard 1st. waitd like an hr plus and still no cal frm the bowlin recep lol! Went dwn and saw tat there are lanes available, BUt then wat happened to my reservation??? played alr then went to play arcade (been a very long time since i played these games, but they are still nice to play though!) Then the topic of goin hm was brought up by dun noe who, and some of them were worried abt the midnight charge and all tat stuff, tat time i was thinking and regreting not renting a car tat day (at 1st tot tat rent car at least must hav $120 for the car and petrol everything, so decided even if i take cab onli 20plus at most 30 onli mah, so nvr rent) and in the midst of all these im only like halfway enjoying myself then came this topic. i mean it was a REAL killin of the spirits and dampener lor! But then come to think of it maybe the rest are not workin and then they might be paiseh to rely on others, no offence! i mean im the type who will work til my bones felt like breakin and work and work, but then when relaxtion i'll play til ALL the group feels tat all hav enjoyed to the MAX. Tats wif the frds i hav now and we'll help each other out in terms of finance and transport, i mean tats wat called frds rite. Now i hav we'll share, next time i dun hav u hav we'll share ag, nvr sayin i pay hw much u muz pay, NAY! i dun wan tat! In the end quite enjoyed ourselves and irvin gave us a surprise by askin his gal, pearline, to giv us a ride hm. POOr THING hav to come all the way frm AMK to fetch! THANK YOU SOOO much!! =)
This incident really strengthened my determination to get a transport alr...

*Friend - One who truely noes who you are, understands, appreciates and loves u just the same*

Birthdayzz

2005-05-21T05:48:00.000+08:00

Went to Hotel Phoenix to move the furniture today, alot of mattresses there, but then finished quite early at 3plus 4. We went back to the factory and the boss bought dim sum and beer ofr us.Were all wondering wat special occasion it is then the daughter confessed it is her birthday. It was very shiok tat day lor! rested frm 4plus to 6plus.
After work went to meet lun and we played CNC for a while withwhich we went to meet uncle li at the MRT. Uncle Li's still the same (rugged, old and like those 70's bengsters, but he's very nice and friendly to us), went to devonshire rd to meet up with our previous Japanese boss(It's his birthday too), celebrated wif him and he was touched i can see tat, then he said tat maybe next sat if we free go to his hs near devonshire to visit his wife and kids (he's got a very beautiful and loving wif and 3 kids, the youngest of which is also a very sweet gal). later on we prceeded to Joo Chiat place where uncle li's frd has a pub there. Went there and drank a little, he introed me to a waitress there, Mellissa. hav a very cute smile, 25, single and tanned, asked me to sing one song with her and then we continued to sing dun noe 4 or 5 more after tat! later on lun's gal came and im impressed by her singing of "hui jia" and "dong shi - sun yanzi" , very alike lor!

*Anuptophobia....*

Tired...

2005-05-21T00:40:00.000+08:00

Really reallly tired atfer all these days of working, but still hav to do it cause dad's not workin and might need some extra cash to get pass this period.
Xiaoyan called during break and she was also shagged over OT at Marriott Hotel.was juz recovering frm a bad case of flu she said and was wondering how hav i been doin, felt tat she called at the rite time cause i was also very shagged alr, but her call brightened me up and also she encouraged me to go on for the sake of watever im doin, thkz xiao mei!
Went to see the star wars movie, quite ok for me, cept tat the receptionist always hav this mentality tat ppl always come in pairs, dun noe y. Everytime i go and watch movie and say, "Ticket for one for somthing" and they will always go like,"ticket for one?? for one??"
and i'll be like,"Yes pls, ticket for one..." thrutout the movie, one thing though, didnt noe tat the movie was a repition of the prevoius chapters, now then noe! tot it was a continued one, lol.. Well.. the movie was ok, ironically, while they were sensing A DISTURBANCE IN THE FORCE, I also SENSE A DISTURBANCE, but not IN THE FORCE, but in my STOMACH. thkz gdness the movie was going to be over and i had to ran all the way back hm to ease tat DISTURBANCE in the toilet! lol!
MapleSEA cant play today, there's some prob i think, wasted! And i hav to thk andrew for letting me play his acc for a while, now wif the new acc in MapleSEA, im aiming for magician....hehehe.
Felt better these days not thinkin abt finding my other half, absolutely no time for it! gd also, if she wil come , she wil come. seems to me tat when i stop findin, gals i hav previously known hav been callin up and contacting, gd i guess. =p
Was thinkin of getting the 2a license liao, then get one super-4 or something cause was thinkin now if i really wanna get a car also hard, so get a suitable transport 1st, maybe will start it when sch reopens, maybe...

*To be or not to be is our decision, to continue or to end is our choice...*

Sooo gd..

2005-05-20T00:18:00.000+08:00

Slept at work today. NOT MY FAULT! cause we were waiting for the lorry and it is like 45 mins before it came, i was looking at the scenery of orchard because we are removin a conco juz behind HMV on the 15th floor. the wind was so gd up there that i slept wifout noeing it. slept for a gd hr before the lorry finally came.SHIOK ah!
looked thru the papers today and saw the ntuc insurance plan, thinkin of getting one of AIA and one of NTUC of hundred each mth, plus minus should last for 20 to 25 yrs, then i 30 plus got a lump sum of $ alr : )...STILL CONSIDERING...

Haiz cant get the 7610 liao, still to steep a price to pay for it, wasted, been wanting to get that.
Sunday is Grace's birthday, guys still undecided on wat to get for her, and grace herself still did not make up her mind on where to go then. tat day maybe got work but i guess i cant go. still ,the $'s very tempting cause its a hundred on sunday and 60 weekday.
star wars come out liao! will find one day to go and see it, seems very nice, hope it doesnt disappoint me.

Sharon msn me earlier on, said dec go on an overseas trip cause she might hav off and will not be flyin for a while, hav to see 1st though... somemore she said she wanna intro a gal from NUS to me, ..hmmm..the gal seems quite cute but wondering if anything will come out of it...

*The love in your heart wasnt put there to stay...love isnt love, till u giv it away...*

Some1 special...

2005-05-18T00:52:00.000+08:00

Was still removing Mandarin today.AND... i saw a gal very cute today, she's workin in the same hotel and was carrying some things in the lift. (Not very preety but tanned, very cute smile and BEAUTIFUL EYES!!) Wanted to ask for her num but she had a frd wif her, gave up the chance and she went to basement (i'm at level1), and she LOOKED BACK be4 the door closed...LOL! i went to basement to look for her but cant find her, WASTED!
To add to my demise on the chance of the gal, today work til 9plus, SHAGGED OUT MAN!
the bosss like torturing us lik tat, eat lunch havent 15mins call us to work liao, wth!

Pestered poor jane ag cause the uploading of the song into blog got some probs, she had to view my own blog and edit for me, WAT A BRILLIANT IT student am I!! She figured out the prob a while later and my blog hav song can upload liao, HOORAY FOR JANE!!

Was a little envious when we went hm today , cause my colleague's gf came and she was lik, "aiyoh, u looked soo shagged,i tom buy some nourishments for u.". NTH TO SAY rite! SOOOO envious lor...nvr mind, i keep sayin this in my mind,"Patience is a virture"......

this is but a sentence tat came up when i was workin
*If only silence is the only way to slove everything....*

More than words could say.

2005-05-17T00:47:00.000+08:00

Shagged out, TOTAL!....cant lift my fingers to type another word...Nitez.

*Success is defined by challenges and risks*

Shagged out!

2005-05-16T01:26:00.000+08:00

Today still removin the furniture at Mandarin hotel. Totally shagged out! I'm like half dead when comin back. Dun say we singaporean workers say 'xiong', even the bangalas workin wif us also say 'die man die man this job!' Lol.

EVOLUTION 9 come out liao. Zhan! Heard frm frd tat jackie chan was at Kallang there demonstrating.. Wasted cant go cause workin.. Got a pic of the car below..VERY VERY NICE!!

Now the feeling of getting a personal car for myself is getting stronger and stronger..(Still considering the pros and cons, but earliest still hav to wait til after poly.. Haiz!). Elgene recommend Lexus altezza, Honda Integra(4 dr), and Peugeot 406..Hmm.. thinking of the Lexus, cause it is comfy, fast, executive look, elegant when needed to too..maybe....

Went supper wif gene and mandy, then went yishun dam. Today got alot of 'Bengs' car, civic type R, Subaru TS wif TURBO, SIR all these. Got one civic type R very nice (cause inside sitting a cute little gal wif her dog looking out the window..VERY CUTE!!!) Stayed for a while then came back.
Haiz.. wondering when i can get my car...

*Like farmers we need to noe tat we cant sow and reap on the same day..*

2005-05-15T22:41:00.000+08:00

EVO 9! Nice rite...My fave..

2005-05-14T23:04:00.000+08:00

Hotel room overlooking esplanade and CBD, cool rite!

Day wif lots of emotions...

2005-05-14T22:34:00.000+08:00

Went for the removal job at Meritus madarin today, The place was very standard lor! U noe in the coffee house and in the lobby there was absolute silence, on top of that they play wat i think was birds calling to make it a very serene place, very soothing indeed.Then later in the afternoon a very funny thing happened, as i was wif my supervisor and another colleague whom their ages were abt late 40's each. We were walking back frm the kopitiam and we had lost our way cause the whole Marina Square is under renovation. Then we reached a path with either left or rite. The supervisor pointed to the left and said ,"come lets go here, adam", then the other one said to me,"come lets go here, adam" and pointed to the rite. The dilemma was because both of them said the words at the same time, and i was like,"left or rite, left or rite.." In the end i waited like 2 to 3 mins for them to argue finish abt which way to go while i quietly sat one corner and relaxed. LOL! (Gd for me also =p)
Called Sharon and she asid she felt better, didnt noe herself y she broke dwn yest but she said she's fine alr. I was thinking, "FINE = Fanatic, Insecure, Neurotic, Emotional" Well, tats comforting!
Took some pics while we were resting before resuming our work at the hotel(at the bottom)very nice rite? Took it wif my 7260! After tat work til go back to factory and boss said tom maybe got OT. gd lah! Waited very long for OT liao. But one thing, MY BACK ACHES LIKE HELL!! Need some1 kind enough to massage for me, getting old liao, Any volunteers???

Dad came back alr, feeling better but he has to go therapy ag in June... haiz, wat will happen leh, no one noes.

Wrote something during teabreak:

*Seemed so fragile yet so free, the life of a being hw gd it can be. The paths of different ppl lie seperately, only he who understands wil noe and see. Some are happy and some are sad, but to stop at these we will not let. It may be others tat enjoy now, soon will be mine where others will bow...*

What a day!

2005-05-14T03:39:00.000+08:00

Went fishing today at 12am, lots of fun cept for the fact tat 2 gals came up to me ask asked mi, "Uncle! got catch any fish anot? Uncle! got anot?"*No words to say* Then when they came closer they paiseh paiseh say, "oh! sorry we tot u and ur child fishing here (my frd brought her younger sis along) Then they kept on smiling and talking abt the beach there..." My frds were giggling when i went up to our relax place cause the 2 gals had said quite loudly and every1 heard it! Haiz! getting too old to be of my actual age...Been talking wif my frd over the finding of the rite jobs and how we wish we could finish poly faster, so we could work alr and then finance every expenses needed.. nevertheless, i will continue to work towards wat i wanted, my dream... Sharon called halfway fishing, she was sobbing and stuff and i let her stay tat way for a while. after she had cooled dwn a little i asked her wat's wrong, she say she just felt like calling me.. And i was like, "??????" Then i asked her if any1 bullied her or something happened to her dogs or family got prob she say nth wrong. Cried ag. Waited for a while and told her i will go to her hs dwnstairs or sumting, she said nvr mind. Poor soul! Wished i could help her but at a loss.. May God help her in ways i cant... *With the passing of time comes disclosure of the strongest, bravest and yet also the weak and timid*

A series of unfortunate events..

2005-05-12T02:09:00.000+08:00

Everything went well today, i guess. Was thinking i'm always the lucky one when comes to working at this place, removal. I'm always the one who got the quite easy job.. Lucky me! Called my dad at the hospital, he still says it ok down there (hav to wait for 2 weeks of therapy then if still cannot heal hav to go for surgery..). Mum seems very lonely, but nth tat i do can cheer her up, haiz. Then dad is like tat, was thinking worst case senario i'll quit sch and start workin full liao. Otherwise the expenses of the family plus the sch fees of my bro and also dad's medical fees..After work went wif my colleagues to visit any colleague of mine who's got heart attack. He seems to be in pain wif both sides of his elbows purplerish red (because of the supposedly suction of the clogged blood in the blood vessels, it looks horrifying!) i'm not very close to him, so i do not noe him much, all i noe is tat he is still single, age abt late 40's, weigh abt over 100kg and is a very loud and humorous person. Was wondering.. Will i become like him, so lonely, so helpless, so carefree tat he doesnt care abt tom..i WOULD NOT wan tat! NO.. i want to hav a loving wife wif 2 kids if can one gal one boy, stable business, and go travelling if free wif family, let them rest and explore the world! Later in the evening i went to visit anothere frd of mine and he told me abt a frd of mine called Pauline. She's into some "situation" and its not very gd on her part, i mean she hav a baby gal liao and she still does the things which i hate now, wtf, she should noe how to thinnk liao mah! Called me yest morning abt 5 plus and cried and stuff. Told me abt alot of things, i mean come on man, she's attached wif a boy who loves her and she still does tat. i lectured her and told her not to and to relax and stuff.. Haiz.. Why are humans always so frivolous and duncare abt the consequences wan??? Nth to say.. *Outwardly wat do they wanna strive for, Inwardly wat do they wanna achieve...*

*xXMy Comfort ZoneXx*

Clear Stock

Study!!

Long Trip to Malaysia

Back Ag!!!

Clubbin.

Nths goin my way..

Start..

Somewhere out there....

ALOT of pic ...FINALLY!!!

ALOT of pic

ALOT of pic

Hmmmmm...............

Jam

Work - Gd or Bad........

Life...............

Dead!

theEnd, theBeginning....

...............

Afresh!!!!

IM BACK!!!!!

IM BACK!!!!!

Trying....

Haiz...

Back..

Is it to be???

Festive joys....issit???

Dilemma...

Making things right

Wat comes 1st....

Wat comes 1st....

Hols End

Meant to be...to continue..

Back

The long wait.....

Everytime!!!!!

Good as new...

Good as new...

No Lessons!!!

Happy dayz..

Noah's Ark

Shoppin spree stopped

Holiday!!

Waitin for run-in

=)

Continuing...

Exhausted.

Shagged...Confused...

Rounding..

Comin nearer..

Waiting.,..

Finally...

Help given...

Ups and Downs..

Shagged....

Busi all the way...

EVerything's fine...I hope...

Sooo nice...

Inner confusion...

Shagged...

Devil's Horn and Angel's Halo...

Slowly but steadily...

Better Man....

Tired...

Day of many happenings...

Strange..

Better..

End of the month..

Alot of items..

One gd deed deserves another..

Sometimes honesty DOESNT help..

Total DISASTER!!!

Welcome..

Photobucket

Waiting..

Friendly allies..

1st...

Soo fast..

No time..

The beginning frm the end....

xXMy Comfort ZoneXx